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    Goober Computer Virus

    You have just received the Goober Computer Virus.Because we don't know how to program…
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    Excerpts from Pet Diaries

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    Scared vs. Apprehension

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    Signs Your Cat Is Too Fat

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    Pet Training

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    Too Distant / Too Close

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    Golf Questions

    Jill: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.Nadine: TELL me about it!…
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    Toy Disclaimers

    Honest Toy Disclaimers * No beanies or babies harmed in the manufacture of this product.…
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    The Turkey Shot Out Of The Oven

    The turkey shot out of the ovenand rocketed into the air,it knocked every plate off the…
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    Factory Supplies

    At the end of my factory shift, I was asked to purchase some supplies. The machines'…
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    Carrier Landings

    Any naval aviator will tell you that landing a plane on an aircraft carrier is THE most…
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    Plus or Minus One

    In a contest in The Washington Post, readers were asked to take an expression using a…
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    Expecting

    A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following…
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    Thanksgiving Blessing

    May your stuffing be tasty, May your holiday turkey be plump, May your potatoes ‘n gravy…
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    Midterm Exam

    The professor of a graduate-school class of gifted students included a HUGE amount of…

TOP TEN THINGS THE APOSTLE PAUL WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE HAD A PC

10. Download MP3's of the Righteous Brothers for entertainment while on those long, tedious missionary journeys

9. Visit WebMD.com about that persistent pain in flesh

8. Spiritual armor would include virus protection software

7. "To live is Christ, to die is to have a 28K modem"

6. Book boat tickets using Priceline.com

5. E-mail pictures of Peter eating pork to the gang back in Jerusalem

4. Church officers: Pastor, Elder, Deacon, System Administrator

3. Use decryption software to interpret tongues

2. Describe conversion experience as the "Divine Reboot"

1. Add Spam to list of cardinal sins

Copyright 2002 Gary Cantwell. Permission is granted to send this to others, but not for commercial purposes.

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