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    Next Question

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Words Per Day

    Abraham was reading an article out loud to his wife. "Did you know that women use about…
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    Large Party

    On one occasion William Howard Taft, in his work as an attorney, took a train to…
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    Wacky Warnings

    Here are the top five winning entries in the Wacky Warning Labels contest, sponsored by…
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    Murphy's Laws of Law Enforcement

    New uniforms and ties attract catsup and gravy.You will never get the urge to use the…
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    Thanksgiving Grace

    My family traditionally begins the evening meal with a prayer of thanks. When they were…
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    Whisper Shock

    When my older brother was very young, he always walked up to the church altar with my…
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    Apology Letter

    Lisa, my co-worker at the travel agency, needed to send a letter of apology to a customer…
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    2 Best Recipes

    Newlywed Wife: "The 2 things I cook best are meatloaf and apple pie."Newlywed Husband:…
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    What's it Take?

    "What do you have to do to become a doctor?" my six-year-old granddaughter once asked.Her…
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    The Ten Most Common Forms of Office Illness

    *The Ten Most Common Forms of Office Illness* 1. The Macy's One Day Sale Flu. 2. The…
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    Parking Confusion

    After driving up and down several lanes, I finally found a parking spot at the shopping…
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    Singing Practice

    Joe's wife likes to sing so she decided to join the church choir. From time to time she…
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    Golf Beginner

    A retiree was given a set of golf clubs by his co-workers.Thinking he'd try the game, he…
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    Warning Signs That You Need A New Doctor

    *Warning Signs That You Need A New Doctor** The patient before you was a goat.* Instead…
Here are ten useful phrases for responding to Christmas presents you would rather not have received:

1.  Thanks a lot!

2.  My word!  What a gift.

3.  Well, well, well ...

4.  If I hadn't put on so much weight recently it would have fitted me perfectly.

5.  Gosh, I hope I never lose this. We're always losing things around here.

6.  It's great; but I'm worried about the envy it may create.

7.  Just my luck to get this on the very Christmas I promised to give all my gifts to charity.

8.  Unfortunately, I am about to enter MI5's Witness Protection programme.

9.  Frankly, I don't deserve this.

10. Really, you shouldn't have.
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