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More Jokes

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    For Charlotte

    A DJ was introducing a record. "This next one," he said, "is for Charlotte Burke, who is…
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    Cell Phone Find

    An employee of the airport found a cell phone in one of the boarding areas. She switched…
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    Ten Dresses

    My mom got mad at my dad the other day and went shopping to relieve her irritation. When…
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    Cow Predictions

    A midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring group of city folks. "One of…
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    School Daze

    It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from…
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    Karmel Recipe

    The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and…
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    Flossing

    As a dental hygienist, I always encourage patients to floss. During one cleaning, the…
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    AMAP

    The interviewer examined the job application then turned to the prospective employee. "I…
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    Freezer Order

    I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals. Forget calling them "Veal…
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    Helping Daddy

    One day a young boy ran crying to his mother and rubbing his behind. His mother said,…
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    First Time Babysitter

    A young girl was babysitting for the first time - beginning her shift shortly after…
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    Sister Cheer Up

    My sister and I are close, and that allows us to be honest with each other. One evening…
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    Mrs. Pierpoint

    A woman is worried about an older woman, a widow, who lives in the apartment next door.…
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    Newcomer Court

    "Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be…
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    Cinderella Question

    The tax accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter…

*Political Correctness For Kids*

Your bedroom isn't cluttered; it's "passage-restrictive."

Kids don't get in trouble anymore. They merely hit "social speed bumps."

You're not having a bad hair day; you're suffering from "rebellious follicle syndrome."

No one's tall anymore. They're "vertically enhanced."

You're not shy. You're "conversationally selective."

You don't talk a lot. You're just "abundantly verbal."

It's not called gossip anymore. It's "transmission of near-factual information."

The food at the school cafeteria isn't awful. It's "digestively challenged."

Your homework isn't missing; it's just having an "out-of-notebook experience."

You're not sleeping in class; you're "rationing consciousness."

You don't have smelly gym socks; you have "odor-retentive athletic footwear."

You weren't passing notes in class. You were "participating in the discreet exchange of penned meditations."

You're not being sent to the principal's office. You're "going on a mandatory field trip to the administrative building.

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