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    Stolen Goat

    The following is a quote from a director of sports information in the Navy, regarding the…
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    The Vet and The Doc

    A veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the…
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    Answering Machine Messages

    *Answering Machine Messages*Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already…
  • police pull over

    Speeding Ticket

    A lady who was speeding had an officer pull her to the side of the road. She didn't have…
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    Solid to Gas

    Some time ago, I was taking a ground school class for private pilots. During the sessions…
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    Jar 47

    A new doctor had arrived in town. He could cure anything and anybody. Everyone was amazed…
  • chickens

    Eggsacting Solution

    A man was having trouble getting his neighbor to keep his chickens fenced in. The…
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    Owed to Spell Checquer

    OWED TO SPELL CHECQUER Eye halve a spelling chequerIt came with my pea seaIt plainly…
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    Flower System

    An absent-minded husband thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his…
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    Reasons Not To Wash

    If you took the same excuses that people use for not going to church and apply them to…
  • flower geranium

    Geraniums

    A man walked into a flower shop and after looking around for several minutes, asked the…
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    Bigger Piece

    One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we were first married, you took…
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    Dog Exercises

    You've seen those fitness ads on TV promising amazing results from all sorts of…
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    Committee Praise

    The new pastor was winding down the service. In the back of the church, the fellowship…
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    Macho Dude

    A young man visiting a dude ranch wanted to be "Macho", and went out walking with one of…

A man having lunch at a Chinese restaurant noticed that the table had been set with forks, not chopsticks.  He asked why. The waiter said "Chopsticks are provided only on request."  

"But," the man countered, "if you gave your patrons chopsticks, you wouldn't have to pay someone to wash all the forks."

"True," the waiter shot back, "but we would have to hire three more people to clean up the mess."

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