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    Catching Fish

    A guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without…
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    Grandmothers

    The following have been taken from papers written by a class of 8-year-olds.A grandmother…
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    What's it Take?

    "What do you have to do to become a doctor?" my six-year-old granddaughter once asked.Her…
  • picture of priest

    Pastoral Visit

    After the birth of their child, an Episcopal priest, wearing his clerical collar, visited…
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    Zoo Thank You

    As a volunteer who conducts educational tours of the Zoo, Sally occasionally receives…
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    Helping Sam at Church

    Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on…
  • wheelbarrow work argument

    Brain vs Brawn

    The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could out do anyone in…
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    General Motors Help Line

    General Motors doesn't have a help line for people who don't know how to drive, because…
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    The Cowboy's New Car

    Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. "I know that smart alec Tex" said the…
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    Ancestry

    The following was overheard at a recent 'high society' party."My ancestry goes back all…
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    One Room School

    The board of education in a nearby town sold off a building that had been a one-room…
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    Sharing

    Uncle Sid and Aunt Sadie are in their eighties and have been married for more than sixty…
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    Tap Away

    During an attack of laryngitis I lost my voice completely for two days. To help me…
  • deer hunting jokes

    Deer Hunting

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one…
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    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…

If your life takes a turn for the worse, remember that you are the one who is driving!

My dog was my only friend. I told my wife that every man needs at least two friends, so she bought me another dog.
--Henny Youngman

Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss things;
Little minds discuss people.

When the guy who made the first drawing board got it wrong, what did he go back to?
--Steven Wright

A gentleman never insults someone unintentionally.
--Oscar Wilde

Noah was an amateur; the Titanic was built by professionals.
--Malcolm Allison

I live by my principles, and one of my principles is flexibility.
--Br. Everett Dirksen

Only dead fish "go with the flow."

It is not enough to have every intelligent person in the country voting for me. I need a majority.
--Adlai Stevenson

No woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.
--George Coote

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
--Douglas Adams

A politician will always be there when he needs you.
--Ian Walsh

There is the greatest practical benefit in making a few failures early in life.
--Thomas Huxley

Future: That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
--Ambrose Bierce

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