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    All You Can Drink

    There was a business man driving down this country road when he spotted a little boy that…
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    E-Mail Blessing

    E-Mail BlessingPeace be unto you, your computer and the e-mail you receive this day.May…
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    School Recommendation

    When I went with my daughter to visit a prestigious university, our student guide pointed…
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    Exemplary Offspring

    Three mothers were sitting around comparing notes on their exemplary offspring."There…
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    Ten Laws of Life

    1. When ones hands are covered in oil, grease, or glue, your nose will start to itch.…
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    Police Baste

    A State Police colleague of mine once received a call from a woman who asked him how to…
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    Chair Test

    An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing…
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    Need a Push

    A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over…
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    Freezer Order

    I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals.Forget calling them "Veal…
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    Beautiful Name Tag

    Our favorite restaurant has a waitress whose name-tag reads "Beautiful." "Is that really…
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    Signs You Are In For A Long Sermon

    Top Ten Signs You Are In For A Long Sermon10. There's a case of bottled water beside the…
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    Kiss Good-bye

    "Dad," a teenaged girl says, running into her father's den, "I'd like to kiss you…
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    No Rest

    The doctor had just been buried. The last words of the service over, his friends and…
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    The Flu Do-Si-Do

    Flu season will be here soon. Here's a square dance you can call when it does.The Flu…
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    Mistakes

    If a barber makes a mistake,It's a new style... If a driver makes a mistake,It is an…
Two campers, Chris and Michael, are awakened by the sounds of an obviously large bear outside their tent, looking for food at their campsite.

Immediately, Chris pulls a pair of running shoes out of his backpack and quickly puts them on.

Incredulous, his friend Michael says, "There's no way you can outrun that bear."

Chris replies, "I don't have to outrun the bear.  I only have to outrun you."
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