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More Jokes

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    Young Man's Disorder

    A young man was visiting a psychiatrist, hoping to cure his eating and sleeping disorder.…
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    Market Conditions

    The stockbroker's secretary answered his phone one morning. "I'm sorry," she said, "Mr.…
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    Are You My Waiter?

    Max Greenberg was at his favorite eatery, the Second Avenue Deli, when he called over the…
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    Broken Scale

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Eulogy

    The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked…
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    Things Learned From Children

    Things I've learned from my children (honest and no kidding): * There is no such thing as…
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    Last Marathon

    Last year I entered the New York City Marathon. The race started and immediately I was…
  • picture of a bumper sticker on a guitar

    More Bumper Stickers

    * FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION! It comes bundled with the software. * I can't dial 911.…
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    Afraid of The Dark

    A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back…
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    Shhhhhh!

    A father had three very active boys. One summer evening, he was playing cops and robbers…
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    Sermon Follow-Up

    A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To…
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    Zack and His Mule

    Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack's friends drove up and…
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    Bank Call

    One of my jobs at a bank is to answer the phones and put callers through to the right…
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    Chicken Neighbour

    A man was having trouble getting his neighbor to keep his chickens fenced in. The…
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    Phrases for When you Receive Unwanted Gifts

    Here are ten useful phrases for responding to Christmas presents you would rather not…

These are real ads from a newspaper.

1.  1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850 or best offer

2.  AMANA WASHER $100.  OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.

3.  SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

4.  FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD PART DOG.

5.  2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

6.  TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH IT'S OWN 1988 MUSTANG, AUTO TRANS., EXCELLENT CONDITION - $6800

7.  DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOUR VALENTINE - HAVE YOUR SEPTIC TANK PUMPED

8.  FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR DOG

9.  FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.  8 YEARS OLD.  UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG

10. GERMAN SHEPHERD.  85 lbs.  NEUTERED.  SPEAKS GERMAN.  FREE.

11. FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.

12. NORDIC TRAC $300 - HARDLY USED - CALL CHUBBIE at:

13. BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING - "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"

14. FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG...LOOKS LIKE A RAT...BEEN OUT AWHILE.....BETTER BE A REWARD

15. HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT"

16. CUTE KITTEN FOR SALE, 2 CENTS OR BEST OFFER

17. WHIRLPOOL BUILT IN OVEN -- FROST FREE!

18. '93 PONTIAC LEMONS - LOW MILES

19. KITTENS 8 WEEKS OLD - SEEKING GOOD CHRISTIAN HOME.

20. TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?  WE OFFER PROFIT.  SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.  STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

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