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    Preaching Assistant

    A minister was called away unexpectedly by the illness of a close family member. He…
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    Last One

    A New Mom took her baby daughter to the supermarket for the first time. She dressed her…
  • puddle

    Country Puddle

    A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the…
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    Living to 104

    At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his…
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    Egg Contents

    One Easter Sunday morning as the minister was preaching the children's sermon, he reached…
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    Card Reader

    "Can people predict the future with cards?" Jessica asked Danny."My mother can," Danny…
  • loveyou

    If You Love Something Variations

    THE ORIGINAL VERSION:If you love something,Set it free...If it comes back, it's yours;If…
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    Chain Fired

    A guy walks into the human resources department of a large company and hands the…
  • office write

    Security Tips

    The following are notices that homeowners can place in a few strategic locations to keep…
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    Bad Flight

    While ferrying workers back and forth from an offshore oil rig, the helicopter lost power…
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    Safe Keeping

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    Convenient Robbery

    Tim and Bill were standing in a bank when a pair of robbers entered the lobby. Not only…
  • Hudson river_plane

    NTSB Report on Flight 1549

    Preliminary Accident Report FT 1549. Captain held responsible for unauthorized actions…
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    Quick Proposal

    At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he…
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    Manservant

    Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next…

These are real ads from a newspaper.

1.  1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850 or best offer

2.  AMANA WASHER $100.  OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.

3.  SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

4.  FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD PART DOG.

5.  2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

6.  TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH IT'S OWN 1988 MUSTANG, AUTO TRANS., EXCELLENT CONDITION - $6800

7.  DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOUR VALENTINE - HAVE YOUR SEPTIC TANK PUMPED

8.  FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR DOG

9.  FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.  8 YEARS OLD.  UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG

10. GERMAN SHEPHERD.  85 lbs.  NEUTERED.  SPEAKS GERMAN.  FREE.

11. FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.

12. NORDIC TRAC $300 - HARDLY USED - CALL CHUBBIE at:

13. BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING - "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"

14. FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG...LOOKS LIKE A RAT...BEEN OUT AWHILE.....BETTER BE A REWARD

15. HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT"

16. CUTE KITTEN FOR SALE, 2 CENTS OR BEST OFFER

17. WHIRLPOOL BUILT IN OVEN -- FROST FREE!

18. '93 PONTIAC LEMONS - LOW MILES

19. KITTENS 8 WEEKS OLD - SEEKING GOOD CHRISTIAN HOME.

20. TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?  WE OFFER PROFIT.  SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.  STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

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