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More Jokes

  • printer 2

    Do It Yourself

    When a guy's printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a…
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    --- WARNING, DANGER! ---

    --- WARNING, DANGER! --- I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering…
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    Procrastinator's Creed

    1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already. 2. I shall…
  • garage sale

    Yard Sale Anger

    A woman was taking her time browsing through everything at a friend's yard sale, and said…
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    Government Pipe Specifications

    1. All pipe is to be made of a long hole, surrounded by metal or plastic centered around…
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    Airline Rage

    As a guy takes his seat on an airplane, he is surprised to find a parrot strapped in next…
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    Signs You are Broke

    SIGNS YOU ARE BROKE 1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"2. Your…
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    Young Patient

    A pediatrician in town always plays a game with some of his young patients to put them at…
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    Happy Eggs

    One Sunday morning, while stationed at Osan Air Base in South Korea, I was in line for…
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    D.C. Flyover

    On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law overheard a patriotic father…
  • italian pizza

    Foreign Pizza

    An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so…
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    Super Golfball

    Two friends went out to play golf and were about to tee off, when one fellow noticed that…
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    You Know It's Your Last Day At Work When…

    You Know It's Your Last Day At Work When...You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when…
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    Car Warning

    A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drove his…
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    Exercise Classes

    I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing.If I *had*…

Reasons You Should Buy a New Car:

- Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

- Instead of an air bag, there is a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

- You lose the stoplight challenge to a 14 year old on a moped.

- 15 minute Jiffy Lube needs to keep your car for 3 days.

- When you gas up, the attendant asks, "Can I re-duct tape that windshield for you?"

- Thieves repeatedly break in your car just to steal the "Club".

- While sitting at a stop light, people keep running up to you and asking if anyone was hurt.

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