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More Jokes

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    Too Late To Date

    An elderly woman died last month.Having never married, she requested no male…
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    Goober Y2K Date Change Project Status:

    Y-to-K Date Change Project Status: Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time…
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    If You Go, I'll Go

    A church had a man in the choir who couldn't sing. Several people hinted to him that he…
  • child2

    Name That Baby

    When Diane found out she was pregnant, she told the good news to anyone who would listen.…
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    Note From Judge

    During court one busy day, the judge quietly passed the clerk a note reading: "Blind on…
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    Cars Wars

    A limousine had encountered a red traffic light and was waiting for it to change when a…
  • doctor3

    Doctor's Writing

    Did you hear about the doctor who wrote out a prescription in the usual doctor's fashion?…
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    One Call

    The two teenagers were arrested. The police sergeant told them they were entitled to a…
  • police pull over

    Pull Over Cookies

    Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Canada, I was stopped by a state trooper…
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    Dog Growth

    A distraught dog owner called his vet pleading for an immediate appointment. He explained…
  • sports balls

    *Famous Sports Quotes*

    "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman…
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    Future Price of Roses

    The young man ahead of my father at the flower shop was taking an unusually long time to…
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    Another Virus Warning

    ***-- VIRUS WARNING --***Folks, I don't normally send out virus warnings, but this one is…
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    Dog Sweater

    In an upscale pet-supply store, a customer wanted to buy a red sweater for her dog.The…
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    Broken Bone

    While leading a tour of kindergarten students through our hospital, I overheard a…

Reasons You Should Buy a New Car:

- Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

- Instead of an air bag, there is a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

- You lose the stoplight challenge to a 14 year old on a moped.

- 15 minute Jiffy Lube needs to keep your car for 3 days.

- When you gas up, the attendant asks, "Can I re-duct tape that windshield for you?"

- Thieves repeatedly break in your car just to steal the "Club".

- While sitting at a stop light, people keep running up to you and asking if anyone was hurt.

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