logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Resume Examples

These are real examples from real resumes:

*Reasons For Leaving Last Job*

- Responsibility makes me nervous.

- They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn't work under those conditions.

- Was met with a string of broken promises and lies, as well as cockroaches.

- I was working for my mom until she decided to move.

- The company made me a scapegoat - just like my three previous employers.

*Job Responsibilities*

- While I am open to the initial nature of an assignment, I am decidedly disposed that it be so oriented as to at least partially incorporate the experience enjoyed heretofore and that it be configured so as to ultimately lead to the application of more rarefied facets of financial management as the major sphere of responsibility.

- I was proud to win the Gregg Typting Award.

*Special Requests and Job Objectives*

- Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job.

- My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I have no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage.

- I procrastinate - especially when the task is unpleasant.

*Physical Disabilities*

- Minor allergies to house cats and Mongolian sheep.

*Personal Interests*

- Donating blood. 14 gallons so far.

*Small Typos That Can Change the Meaning*

- Education: College, August 1880-May 1984.

- Work Experience: Dealing with customers' conflicts that arouse.

- Develop and recommend an annual operating expense fudget.

- I'm a rabid typist.

- Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain operation.

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Today I didn't Do It

    One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three…
  • Default Image

    Fruit Cake Top Ten

    Top Ten Uses for Fruit Cake10. Use slices to balance that wobbly kitchen table.9. Use…
  • Default Image

    Breaker, Breaker Dog Buddy

    My son Ward owns a shiny green four-wheel-drive truck. He also owns a 110-pound black…
  • black snake

    Black Snake

    It was the first camping experience for Jed. As soon as he had pitched his tent, he went…
  • Default Image

    Walk-in Scream

    A woman went to a walk-in clinic, where she was seen by a young, new doctor. After about…
  • woman old4

    No Stairs

    An older lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the…
  • ice cream2

    Martha's Way vs My Way

    Martha's way #1: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent…
  • Default Image

    More Sayings

    Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets. Life is an…
  • A funny conversation between brothers.

    Silly Mom

    Thanks to list member Lowell Guebert for sending in this real life, happened to her,…
  • Default Image

    Offended Goober

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
  • suitcases

    Travelling Too Light

    A joke from back in the day when people needed a paper ticket to board an airplane ... A…
  • Default Image

    Goober Coffee Maker

    The newlywed Goober went to the store to ask how to operate the new coffeemaker received…
  • Default Image

    Finkel's Fine

    A little woman called Mount Sinai Hospital. She said, Hello, darling, I'd like to talk…
  • Default Image

    Plane Seat

    It was Judi's first plane trip.Boarding the aircraft she settled into a window seat in…
  • Default Image

    Don't Repeat

    My husband, Michael, and I were at a restaurant with his boss, a rather stern older man.…