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More Jokes

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    Insufficient Brain Activity

    A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that…
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    Car Sale

    Judi tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the…
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    Combination Faith

    The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the…
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    If Airlines Sold Paint

    *If Airlines Sold Paint*Customer: Hi. How much is your paint?Clerk: Well, sir, that all…
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    Doctor's Orders

    Doctor: "I see you're over a month late for your appointment. Don't you know that nervous…
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    Taa-Daa!

    A magician calls a man up on stage, hands him a mallet, and instructs the guy to hit him…
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    Car Ads

    If the car ad claims ..., it really means ... - rough condition... too bad to lie about -…
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    Silent Monastery

    Sister Mary Katherine entered the Monastery of Silence. The Priest said, "Sister, this is…
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    Priory Priority

    The 104-year-old building that had served as the priory and primary student residence of…
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    Lodge Meeting

    The wife heard her husband come back into the house not too long after he had left.She…
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    Bad News From The Doctor

    A man hadn't been feeling well at all, so he went to his doctor for a complete check-up.…
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    Mess Sign

    A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, "Don't Waste Food -- Food will win the…
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    World's Easiest Test

    Here is the world's easiest test. You should be able to get 100% on this one. 1. How long…
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    How Does This Work?

    Bob was on vacation, visiting a Las Vegas casino for the first time. He decided to play…
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    Boy or Girl

    Man: "Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a…

Rules for Laboratory Workers

1. When you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly.

2. First draw your curves, then plot the data.

3. Experience is directly proportional to the equipment ruined.

4. Experiments must be reproducible. They should all fail the same way.

5. A record of data is essential. It indicates you have been working.

6. In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.

7. Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them.

8. Teamwork is essential in the lab. It allows you to blame someone else.

9. Always leave room to add an explanation when it doesn't work.

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