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More Jokes

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    Universal Solvent

    "The father was very proud when his son went off to college. He came to tour the school…
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    Here Kitty

    Once there was a man named Jim, who let his dog out to pee late one night.He watched some…
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    Grandpa And The Computer

    *Grandpa And The Computer*The computer swallowed GrandpaYes honestly, its true.He pressed…
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    The Night Shift

    A man got a job as a night watchman at a factory. There had been a lot of thefts by the…
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    A Touch of Home

    Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of my home…
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    Foot Pill

    A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the…
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    If Only Life Could Be Like A Computer

    If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over!To get…
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    Granny's Visit

    Little Tony was so happy to see his grandmother that he ran up and gave her a big hug.…
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    Silent Monastery

    Sister Mary Katherine entered the Monastery of Silence. The Priest said, "Sister, this is…
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    Strange Problem

    A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day."Doc, there's something…
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    Do It Yourself

    When a guy's printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a…
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    Fridge Magnet Smiles

    You have all seen those little hand painted signs hung in so many kitchens. Many are…
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    Small Town Justice

    A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.…
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    Little Tim's Goldfish

    Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.…

Rules for Laboratory Workers

1. When you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly.

2. First draw your curves, then plot the data.

3. Experience is directly proportional to the equipment ruined.

4. Experiments must be reproducible. They should all fail the same way.

5. A record of data is essential. It indicates you have been working.

6. In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.

7. Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them.

8. Teamwork is essential in the lab. It allows you to blame someone else.

9. Always leave room to add an explanation when it doesn't work.

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