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More Jokes

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    Actual Church Bulletin Bloopers

    (From the Archives back in 1999)1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other…
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    Official ID Card

    My husband, a U.S. Coast Guard pilot, was on an exchange tour with the Royal Navy in…
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    Tired and Thirsty

    Three students are leaving their last classes of the day.The law student is thinking,…
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    It Pays to Read Labels

    I finally figured out why I am so "full-figured"!As I was conditioning my hair in the…
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    Rejected Invitation

    Mrs. Jones was reading a letter at breakfast. Suddenly she looked up suspiciously at her…
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    Camping Privacy

    Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their…
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    Thunderstorm Plea

    An airliner flew into a violent thunderstorm and was soon swaying and bumping around the…
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    Hans Olaffsen's Laundry

    Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants,…
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    The 3 stages of man

    The 3 stages of man:He believes in Santa Claus.He doesn't believe in Santa Claus.He is…
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    Logic Amongst the Sciences

    A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street cafe watching people…
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    All Purpose Excuse Form

    Here is an all purpose excuse form, designed to get you out of the trouble you've gotten…
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    Bedtime Suggestion

    I'd had a pretty hectic day with my four-year-old. When bed-time finally came, I laid…
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    Hunting Feedback

    I love the outdoors, and because of my passion for hunting and fishing, my family eats a…
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    How Cold is it?

    An annotated thermometer: (degrees Fahrenheit, then Celsius) +50 / +10* New York tenants…

office writeThe following are notices that homeowners can place in a few strategic locations to keep burglars away.

Dear Butcher: Starting tomorrow, please leave eight pounds of meat for Brutus. Six pounds only makes him angry and vicious!

Dear Letter Carrier: We found bloodstains all over our mail. They must be yours. The next time you put mail into our mail-slot, please be sure to keep all parts of your body well clear of the openings. PS: Any sign of that book we sent for, "The Care and Feeding of Wild Jungle Cats"?

Dear Exterminator: Be very careful when you go inside! The termites have eaten through most of the floorboards and you will fall into the basement where all of the rats are!

To whom it may concern: Some of the items in this house have been engraved with Federal Identification Numbers. Others have merely been wired to explode when touched. Good luck...

Selma, don't come in! The boa constrictor got loose again.

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