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    Pastor To The Rescue

    There were two men shipwrecked on this island. The minute they got on to the island one…
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    Geese V

    Q: Why is one side of the V geese make always shorter than the other? ........... A:…
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    Good Guess

    A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. "Here is the situation,"…
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    Watermelon Mistake

    Discovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to…
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    Community Newspaper

    Gilbert, South Carolina is such a small community, I was surprised that they had a…
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    Anti-Burglar Signs

    The following are a few simple ways to keep burglars out of the house by putting a few…
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    Why Are You Here?

    A man dressed as napoleon went to see a psychiatrist at the urging of his wife. "What's…
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    Accident and Interview

    Thorn was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off…
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    One Hard Question

    There was a student who wanted to be admitted to the University.He was smart enough to…
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    No Frills Airlines

    ...they don't sell tickets, they sell chances. ...all the insurance machines in the…
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    Corporate America in the 90's

    You know you work in Corporate America in the 90's if: - You've sat at the same desk for…
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    Restaurant Line

    A well-put together, elderly gentleman left his Maserati Gran Turismo with the valet,…
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    Disappearing Dinosaurs

    Scientists have shown that the moon is moving away at a tiny, although measurable…
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    Sweat Dreams

    While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old…
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    Rose Plague

    An elderly parish priest was tending his garden near a convent when a passerby stopped to…

office writeThe following are notices that homeowners can place in a few strategic locations to keep burglars away.

Dear Butcher: Starting tomorrow, please leave eight pounds of meat for Brutus. Six pounds only makes him angry and vicious!

Dear Letter Carrier: We found bloodstains all over our mail. They must be yours. The next time you put mail into our mail-slot, please be sure to keep all parts of your body well clear of the openings. PS: Any sign of that book we sent for, "The Care and Feeding of Wild Jungle Cats"?

Dear Exterminator: Be very careful when you go inside! The termites have eaten through most of the floorboards and you will fall into the basement where all of the rats are!

To whom it may concern: Some of the items in this house have been engraved with Federal Identification Numbers. Others have merely been wired to explode when touched. Good luck...

Selma, don't come in! The boa constrictor got loose again.

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