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  • snake

    Car 34

    A young man is an avid listener to the city's police frequency, and he leaves the scanner…
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    Bathroom Exasperation

    As the lone female in our house, I find that certain male habits have really begun to get…
  • centipede

    Centipede Snack

    A guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to…
  • computer-keyboard

    Computer Acronyms

    For those computer literate souls out there: ISDN - It Still Does Nothing APPLE -…
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    Time To Go

    The pastor was known for the clarity and brevity of his sermons. His talks were well…
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    Grandmothers

    The following have been taken from papers written by a class of 8-year-olds.A grandmother…
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    Bystander

    Man: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a…
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    Don't Smoke

    A couple of hours into a visit with my mother, she noticed I hadn't once lit up a…
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    If Dr. Seuss Wrote for Star Trek: The Next Generation

    Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star,So, Data, please, how far? How far? Data: Our ship…
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    Nail Biting

    Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it’s biting my…
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    Not-So-Bright People

    AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked "intellectual…
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    Where's Mommy

    One evening after dinner, a five-year-old boy noticed that his mother had gone out and he…
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    Never Be Late

    A local priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A…
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    Tattoo Call

    I couldn't help overhearing a man at a nearby pay phone. "I know it's something you…
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    Cookie Calories

    A husband took his young daughter to the grocery store to help him buy groceries. In…

A row of bottles on my shelf

caused me to analyze myself.

One yellow pill I have to pop

Goes to my heart so it won't stop.

A little white one that I take

goes to my hands so they won't shake.

The blue ones that I use a lot

tell me I'm happy when I'm not.

The purple pill goes to my brain

and tells me that I have no pain.

The capsules tell me not to wheeze

or cough or choke or even sneeze.

The red ones, smallest of them all

Go to my blood so I won't fall.

The orange ones, very big and bright

prevent my leg cramps in the night.

Such an array of brilliant pills,

helping to cure all kinds of ills.

But what I'd really like to know...........

Is what tells each one where to go!

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