God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
And the eyesight to tell the difference.
-
More Jokes
-
Seen in the Cafeteria
At work, my dad noticed that the name of an employee was the same as an old friend. He… -
Speech Flirt
During a conference, I was pleasantly surprised to be seated next to a very handsome man.… -
When I'm An Old Lady
When I'm an old lady, I'll live with each kid,And bring so much happiness...just as they… -
Microsoft TV Dinner
Instructions for Microsoft's TV Dinner:You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing… -
Top Ten Signs You Might Have a Bad Furnace Repair Guy
10. His face permanently blackened like a cartoon bomb went off 9. Pushes his personal… -
New Employee Orientation
Five cannibals get appointed as engineers in a high-tech company. During the welcoming… -
Cough Remedy
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against the wall. The… -
Newbie Preacher
A newly appointed young preacher was contacted by the local funeral director to hold a… -
Surprise Gift
The man walked over to the perfume counter and told the clerk he'd like a bottle of… -
If They Had a Doting Mother
*If They Had a Doting Mother* MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I… -
Noisy Neighbors
A man was telling his friend about his upstairs neighbors. "They started to jump up and… -
Supporting a Family
Jake had proposed to young Gina and was being interviewed by his prospective… -
Things Not To Say or Do at a Job Interview
** See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably.** Ask… -
Kid Comments
* A kindergarten teacher asked, "What is the shape of the earth ?"One lil' girl spoke up:… -
Punctuation
A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher.…
-
