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  • Default Image

    Family Records

    The following was overheard at a recent high society party..."My ancestry goes all the…
  • antique gas pumps

    Looking Funny

    According to statistics, last year over 17 million American families paid a lot of money…
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    You Know You Are a Geek When

    You know you are a geek when . . .You look at a movie trailer and think, "I have that…
  • do not_disturb

    Do Not Disturb

    After a worship service at First Baptist Church in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a…
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    Time To Go

    The pastor was known for the clarity and brevity of his sermons. His talks were well…
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    Goober Line Painter

    A goober who had been unemployed for several months got a job with Public Works. She was…
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    Card Name

    A customer called the airline's reservation office to pay for his ticket with a credit…
  • horse race

    Worst Horse Ever

    A jockey is in the parade ring discussing race tactics with the horse's trainer. The…
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    Goober Flight Lesson

    A goober went to a flight school, insisting she wanted to learn to fly that day. As all…
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    No Horns

    The Monday Afternoon Club, an organization of wealthy city women, met and decided that…
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    Lobster Tails

    A guy was down on Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco when he saw a seafood restaurant and…
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    I Just Can't Drive Today

    For the second time in a row, I was forced to impose on the woman with whom I carpooled…
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    Slow-Driving Grandma

    Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police…
  • winter

    Winter in Wisconsin

    It's winter in WisconsinAnd the gentle breezes blow,70 miles per hourAt 52 below! Oh, how…
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    Hearing Request

    During a January revival an evangelist asked the people in line what they needed.One…

Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights so long that the protective shades I wore left a big white circle around each eye.

Gazing at myself in the mirror the next day, I thought, "Man, I look like a clown."

I had almost convinced myself that I was over-reacting until I got in line at the grocery store. I felt a tug at my shirt and looked down to see a toddler staring up at me.

He asked, "Are you giving out balloons?"

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