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More Jokes

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    Solid to Gas

    Some time ago, I was taking a ground school class for private pilots. During the sessions…
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    Husband and Wife Christmas Shopping

    A couple were in a busy shopping center just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed…
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    Possessed Computer?

    For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers…
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    Tie Conspiracy

    At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district court judge found a green tie that…
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    Toaster Request

    When my son was two or three and learning the ways of American life, he watched me place…
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    Minivan Tow

    A man was driving down the highway late one night when his mini-van broke down. He turned…
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    Second Wave

    While the soldiers stood at attention during a parade, a private waved to someone in the…
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    First Date Nerves

    A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks…
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    Rattlesnakes

    Felix, my husband, was playing golf with our town's fire chief when he hit a ball into…
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    Flight Advice

    On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window. Since it was…
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    Helpful Mechanic

    Sally told her friend, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, so I was…
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    Needled

    At a naval barracks the enlisted men were being given their shots prior to going…
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    Cruise Questions

    Top Ten Silliest Questions asked on a Cruise Ship - Paul Grayson, Cruise Director for the…
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    Wire Guard

    Gale-force winds and frigid temperatures had taken their toll. Snapped electric wires…
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    It Pays to Read Labels

    I finally figured out why I am so "full-figured"!As I was conditioning my hair in the…

Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights so long that the protective shades I wore left a big white circle around each eye.

Gazing at myself in the mirror the next day, I thought, "Man, I look like a clown."

I had almost convinced myself that I was over-reacting until I got in line at the grocery store. I felt a tug at my shirt and looked down to see a toddler staring up at me.

He asked, "Are you giving out balloons?"

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