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More Jokes

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    Losing New Balls

    Morris had been playing golf for years. He always used the very finest equipment, but his…
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    Sauce Control Center

    Becky prepared a pasta dish for a dinner party she was giving. In her haste, however, she…
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    Maranatha

    David Jeremiah told of this one conference where a pastor was talking to the group and…
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    A Bear, a Lion and a Pig

    A bear, a lion, and a pig meet. I know what your thinking they eat the PIG...NOThe bear…
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    Weight Training

    My grandfather worked in a blacksmith shop when he was a boy, and he used to tell me,…
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    Put Him Back

    When my now 14-year-old daughter was 3 and her younger brother was getting into…
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    Brotherly Chores

    Drew and Timmy were brothers. One day Mom and Dad had to go into town. Dad told Drew,…
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    Patriotic Father

    On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law overheard a patriotic father…
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    The Beginning

    When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his…
  • picture of hurricane evacuation sign route

    Florida Hurricane Advice

    We're about to enter the peak of the hurricane season. Any day now, you're going to turn…
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    Allergy Medicine

    During a revival, the visiting evangelist arrived without his allergy medicine. Our…
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    Positively Wrong

    A linguistics professor was lecturing his class."In English," he explained, "a double…
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    The War of the Navels

    The War of the Navels People have navels of different kinds,Ineys and outeys, to that…
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    Party Advice

    A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly…
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    Dinosaur Highway

    A goober was taking the tour of a national park not long ago. The ranger mentioned to the…

Side Effects of a Life in Comedy

* Recurring nightmare: as your "Harpo Meets Teller" routine is bombing, you realize you're doing a radio show.

* Your social status is one small notch above mimes and rodeo clowns.

* People are always asking, "Ooh, do you know Adam Sandler?"

* Wisenheimer's Syndrome.

* You laugh on the outside, but inside you harbor a bitter resentment toward people who have enough money for food.

* Instead of crow's feet, you get punchlines.

* You have to start the day with a couple of quick knock-knock jokes to get rid of "the shakes."

* The grandkids keep breaking your dentures trying to wind them up.

* Mom was right: your face *does* freeze that way, after a couple of decades.

* Everything tastes funny.

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