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More Jokes

  • antique gas pumps

    Looking Funny

    According to statistics, last year over 17 million American families paid a lot of money…
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    Away Messages

    When you are out of the office, here are some away messages to use:1. Thank you for your…
  • airplane1

    Captain Discipline

    About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a…
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    Lawyer Light Bulb

    Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?A: Such number as may be deemed…
  • rifle range

    Rifle Tech Support

    It was decided at Microsoft, during a brilliant brainstorming session, that military…
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    Bunch Of Laughs

    Over the massive front doors of a church, these words were inscribed: The Gate of…
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    Waiting for Dark

    Preparing for a family vacation, Kathy and Matt explained to their young children that…
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    Driver's License Examiners

    While discussing the plight of Driver's license examiners, a former motor-vehicle-bureau…
  • university building

    Evaluation Excerpts

    These are actual excerpts from college course evaluation forms: 1. "The textbook is…
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  • phone handheld 2

    Spelling Information

    "Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company." "Would you spell that,…
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    Cherokee Language

    A Cherokee Indian was a special guest at an elementary school. He talked to the children…
  • Proofreading is an important job in many different fields.

    The Importance of Proofing

    ~ IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you are one of hundreds of parachuting enthusiasts who bought our…
  • milestone

    Why Some Countries CAN'T Go Metric

    If the metric system did ever take over, we'd have to change our thinking to the…
  • Picture of Newspaper

    Good News

    *Good News* The parachute company says you'll get a full refund. They say the house…

Side Effects of a Life in Comedy

* Recurring nightmare: as your "Harpo Meets Teller" routine is bombing, you realize you're doing a radio show.

* Your social status is one small notch above mimes and rodeo clowns.

* People are always asking, "Ooh, do you know Adam Sandler?"

* Wisenheimer's Syndrome.

* You laugh on the outside, but inside you harbor a bitter resentment toward people who have enough money for food.

* Instead of crow's feet, you get punchlines.

* You have to start the day with a couple of quick knock-knock jokes to get rid of "the shakes."

* The grandkids keep breaking your dentures trying to wind them up.

* Mom was right: your face *does* freeze that way, after a couple of decades.

* Everything tastes funny.

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