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    Label Warning

    My in-laws gave us a beautiful knife set--top quality.The accompanying cutting board,…
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    Vet Cure

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    Aerobic Dismay

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    Prison Riot

    The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like…
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    Died In The Service

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    Get Moving

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    Circle Stand

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    Pet Hotline

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    Rich Guy

    One day a rich man drives pass a open field and he sees a guy standing there eating grass…
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    New Librarian

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    Executive Approval

    For many years I worked as a receptionist and switchboard operator at a busy company.…
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    4 Year Ceiling

    A young woman, pursuing a graduate degree in art history, was going to Italy to study the…
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    Hymns For The Aging

    *Hymns for the Aging* Precious Lord, Take my Hand (And Help Me Get Up) It is Well with My…
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    Turkey Hotline

    TRUE STORIES FROM THE BUTTERBALL Turkey Hotline, where people call to get advice on how…
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    Breakfast Call

    When my son was in the ninth grade, we reluctantly agreed to let him move into the…

A couple with three children waited in line at San Francisco's Pier 41 to purchase tickets for a sightseeing boat to Alcatraz Prison.  The children weren't good at waiting: they fidgeted, whined, and punched one another.  The frazzled parents reprimanded them to no avail.

Finally they reached the ticket window.

"Five tickets, please," the father said.  "Two round trip, three one way."

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