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More Jokes

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    Golf desire

    Detailed instructions on managing your subscription are included after the body of this…
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    The Pledge

    Grandpa Cartnell was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how…
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    Crossing the Road

    There's a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming…
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    2503 Years Old

    A tourist is traveling with a guide through one of the thickest jungles in Latin America,…
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    Stolen Truck

    The young goober came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Jake, somebody just…
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    The Night Shift

    A man got a job as a night watchman at a factory. There had been a lot of thefts by the…
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    I Just Can't Drive Today

    For the second time in a row, I was forced to impose on the woman with whom I carpooled…
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    Hearing Loss

    A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don't think my wife's hearing is as good as it used…
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    Grandmother on the Stand

    A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial--a…
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    Found Wallet

    While shopping in a supermarket in Washington, D.C., I heard over the PA system:"A wallet…
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    Dangerous Criminal

    One night, a lady stumbled into the police station with a black eye. She claimed she…
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    Hymns vs. Choruses

    An old farmer went to the city one weekend and attended the big city church. He came home…
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    Illegal Turn

    A man in a hurry taking his 8-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light where it…
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    Service for One

    On Sunday, the new young pastor arrived at church and found only an old farmer had shown…
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    50 Years From Now

    Three elderly gents were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about…

You know you're getting older if:

1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.

2. Your try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.

3. At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.

4. Your back goes out but you stay home.

5. When you wake up looking like your driver's license picture.

6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch.

7. When your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.

8. When happy hour is a nap.

9. When you're on vacation and your energy runs out before your money does.

10. When you say something to your kids that your mother said to you and you always hated it.

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