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More Jokes

  • A funny joke about a man who takes up tennis later in life.

    Tennis Talk

    A manager was told by his doctor to take up some sport for exercise so he decided to play…
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    Good Evening, Ladies and Gentlemen

    A friend was lecturing in Latin America. He was going to use a translator, but to…
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    Bar Room Houdini

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…
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    Chicken Recovery

    A farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chickens his father had…
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    Pastor To The Rescue

    There were two men shipwrecked on this island. The minute they got on to the island one…
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    Home Donations

    A tired homemaker opened the front door of her home to find a young minister from the…
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    Fore!

    My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game. "You have to count my…
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    Shopping Bags

    It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large…
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    Military Man

    A career military man, who had retired as a Master Sergeant, was telling the new recruits…
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    Lost In Jail

    I was reviewing my client's case with him in prison when it was announced that visitors…
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    Cheap Gas

    When the car engine developed a slight knock, the husband asked his wife if she had…
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    Preacher's Best Years

    A preacher, who shall we say was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help…
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    Navy Shots

    While I'm not sure of the procedure now, when I was in the Navy, every so often, you got…
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    Head Check

    One weekend my friend Sally, a nurse, was looking after her six-year-old nephew when he…
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    10 Most Wanted

    Little Sammy's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station.…
1.  You wake up at 3 a.m.  to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
2.  You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape Navigator 1.1 or higher."
3.  You name your children Eudora, Mozillia and Dotcom.
4.  You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
5.  You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.
6.  You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access.
7.  You laugh at people with 9600-baud modems.
8.  You start using smileys in your snail mail.
9.  Your hard drive crashes.  You haven't logged in for two hours.  You start to twitch.  You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's access number.  You try to hum to communicate with the modem ....and you succeed.
10.  You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com
12.  You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at AOL dot com."
13.  All of your friends have an @ in their names.
14.  Your cat has its own home page.
15.  You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
16.  You check your mail.  It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
17.  Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
18.  You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
19.  You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
20.  You tell the cab driver you live at "
http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html"
21.  You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
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