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More Jokes

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    Toaster Request

    When my son was two or three and learning the ways of American life, he watched me place…
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    Military Chat

    During the second Gulf War, I was an Air Force colonel. I routinely flew on different…
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    Lemon-Aid

    A local bar was so sure its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a…
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    Better Preaching

    After the visiting preacher finished, a woman came up and said, "You were much better…
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    You Know It's Time To Turn Your Computer Off When

    You know it's time to turn your computer off and read a book when ....... 1. A friend…
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    Keyboard Jockey Exercise

    For those keyboard jockeys (those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day)…
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    Big Toe Tingle

    A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day. "Doc, there's…
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    Dog Growth

    A distraught dog owner called his vet pleading for an immediate appointment. He explained…
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    Patio Problem

    My husband, Ray, was attempting to build a patio for the first time. He bought 100 cement…
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    Sixteen Steps to Build a Campfire

    1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left…
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    Golf Questions

    Jill: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.Nadine: TELL me about it!…
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    Corporate America in the 90's

    You know you work in Corporate America in the 90's if: - You've sat at the same desk for…
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    Police Pastor

    A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the…
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    Backwoods Delivery

    Deep in the backwoods, the goober's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and…
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    Dog Report

    Craig's two kids are in the same class at school, and the teacher had the class write…
1.  You wake up at 3 a.m.  to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
2.  You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape Navigator 1.1 or higher."
3.  You name your children Eudora, Mozillia and Dotcom.
4.  You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
5.  You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.
6.  You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access.
7.  You laugh at people with 9600-baud modems.
8.  You start using smileys in your snail mail.
9.  Your hard drive crashes.  You haven't logged in for two hours.  You start to twitch.  You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's access number.  You try to hum to communicate with the modem ....and you succeed.
10.  You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com
12.  You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at AOL dot com."
13.  All of your friends have an @ in their names.
14.  Your cat has its own home page.
15.  You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
16.  You check your mail.  It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
17.  Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
18.  You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
19.  You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
20.  You tell the cab driver you live at "
http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html"
21.  You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
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