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More Jokes

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    Scale Pondering

    Two youngsters were closely examining bathroom scales on display at the department…
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    The French Legionnaires

    There's these two French Legionnaires in the desert, and they've been separated from…
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    Dollar Measure

    Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed, so my brother, Josh, and I decided to…
  • County Chairmen

    County Chairmen

    Two opposing county chairman were sharing a rare moment together. The Democratic chairman…
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    Junior's Nickels

    There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at the local grocery store. The…
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    Visiting Oxford

    An guy was visiting Oxford University for the first time. He stopped a passing Oxford don…
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    Landing Check

    I was inspecting communications facilities in Alaska. Since I had little experience in…
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    Thank You Cards

    My first stop on my vacation was my sister's house in Montana. She's extremely organized.…
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    Good Old Dave

    Morris walks out into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into…
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    Let Me Feel Your Pain

    It can buy a house but not a home. It can buy a bed, but not sleep. It can buy a clock…
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    Half Diet

    A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight. She'd made her…
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    Dynamite Bumps

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Strangest Recording

    I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.It said, "You…
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    Four Letter Surgery

    Jerry is recovering from day surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling."I'm ok but…
  • picture of cat on roof

    Cat's Guide For Human Care

    More Excerpts from "The Cat's Guide To Caring For Your Human. Cats are beautiful,…

Signs of our TimeIn a veterinarian's office:
"All unattended children given free kitten"

In the parking lot outside a veterinarian's office in Silverton, OR:
"Parking for customers only; others will be neutered."

In a veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

Billboard on the side of the road:
"Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."

In a non-smoking area:
"If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On maternity room door:
"Push, Push, Push."

On the fence of someone's home:
"Salesmen welcome - dog food is expensive."

Outside a muffler shop:
"No appointment necessary, we'll hear you coming."

In the front yard of a funeral home:
"Drive carefully; we'll wait."

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