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    Optomist's Hunting Dog

    Friends, one an optimist and the other a pessimist could never quite agree on any topic…
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    Lots of Kids

    I have five siblings, three sisters and two brothers. One night I was chatting with my…
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    Men's Thesaurus

    "IT'S A GUY THING"Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it,…
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    Why Are You Here?

    A man dressed as napoleon went to see a psychiatrist at the urging of his wife. "What's…
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    The friars of Flowers (pun alert)

    Some friars were behind in their belfry payments, so they opened a small florist shop to…
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    Passed Note

    A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher.…
  • horses times 2

    Horse Woes

    Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding…
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    Doctor's Orders

    Doctor: "I see you're over a month late for your appointment. Don't you know that nervous…
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    Stupid Inventions

    Stupid Inventions: - Black Highlighter - Braille Driver's Manual - Clear Correction Fluid…
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    Ugly Suit

    When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk's hand was bandaged, but…
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    Freedom

    The Fourth of July was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to…
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    Y2K Backup System

    While we believe we will be fully Y2K compliant by January 1, 2000, and most of our…
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    Landing in the Fog

    An airliner is coming into land at an airport obscured by fog. Visibility is practically…
  • Picture of a car alarm remote

    Parenting Idea

    I was with a friend in a cafe' when a noisy car alarm interrupted our conversation. "What…
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    College Nerves

    While touring the University with some college-bound friends, I saw an advertisement that…

Your favorite section of the newspaper is "25 Years Ago Today."

The parts that have arthritis are the parts where you feel best.

A big evening with your friends is sitting around comparing living wills.

Your clothes go into the overnight bag so you can fill the suitcase with your pills.

Somebody you consider an old-timer calls you an old-timer.

Your idea of a change of scenery is looking to the left or right.

Your knees buckle, but your belt won't.

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