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    Priest Twin

    Our priest suddenly became ill and asked his twin brother, also a priest, to fill in for…
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    Lobster Pets

    After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two…
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    Art Interpretation

    Liz goes to her first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a…
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    Ode to a Shedding Cat

    I think that I shall never seeA cat that sheds as much as thee. Thy fur that sticks is…
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    Universal Solvent

    "The father was very proud when his son went off to college. He came to tour the school…
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    Mess Sign

    A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, "Don't Waste Food -- Food will win the…
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    Application To Date My Daughter

    NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unlessaccompanied by a complete…
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    Things It Takes Most Of Us 50 Years To Learn

    1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.2.…
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    Misbehaving Phone Call

    Seven year old Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school.Two days…
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    Prepared Chicken

    "May I take your order?" the waiter asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"…
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    Ugly Suit

    When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk's hand was bandaged, but…
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    Obituary Notice

    A woman goes into the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently…
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    Dextrocardia Question

    I went to a medical clinic for an electrocardiogram. While the technician was lining up…
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    Young Businessman

    A young businessman had just started his own firm. He had just rented a beautiful office…

1.  As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a gigantic smile and high-five the salesman.

2.  You notice that the car phone they threw in "for free" has a direct line to Moes's Towing Company.

3.  The booster cables are not in the trunk but are permanently soldered to the battery.

4.  The hood has been equipped with a push-button device for quick and easy opening.

5.  The "Purchased From" sticker at the bottom of the rear license plate has been removed.

6.  You get a "Good Luck" card from the previous owner.

7.  As you drive up to a service station for gas, the mechanic opens the big door and waves you in.

8.  When you leave for work the next morning, you notice a tow truck parked about a block from your driveway.  As you go by, it silently falls in behind you.

9.  The little "Service Engine" warning signal in the dashboard comes on and reads "Me Again."

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