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More Jokes

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    Tattoo Call

    I couldn't help overhearing a man at a nearby pay phone. "I know it's something you…
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    Mother Quotes

    PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight…
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    Jogging Time

    A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He…
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    PC Assets

    My husband refused to learn how to operate a PC. I tried to get him to realize how…
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    Logic Amongst the Sciences

    A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street cafe watching people…
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    Bus Fare

    Before boarding a bus, a man asked the driver, "What is the fare to the train…
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    "If It" Office Advice

    If it rings, answer it. Talk kindly. If it clanks, call the repairman. If it whistles,…
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    Carrier Landings 2

    Flying into a Middle East airport, my co-pilot and I reviewed our flight plan for the…
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    Dad Value

    A father and his small son were standing in front of the tiger's cage at the zoo. The…
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    Strange Lawsuits

    An inmate filed a $5 million lawsuit against himself (he claimed that he violated his own…
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    New Pet

    A man was driving down a country road when he saw a baby pig along side the road. He…
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    Manservant

    Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next…
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    Blizzard Police

    While driving through Buffalo after a heavy snow storm, a motorist noted a policeman,…
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    Power Lesson

    A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings…
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    Signs of Banned Substances

    Signs That An Athlete Is Using A Banned Substance:Gets "psyched" before each competition…

1.  As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a gigantic smile and high-five the salesman.

2.  You notice that the car phone they threw in "for free" has a direct line to Moes's Towing Company.

3.  The booster cables are not in the trunk but are permanently soldered to the battery.

4.  The hood has been equipped with a push-button device for quick and easy opening.

5.  The "Purchased From" sticker at the bottom of the rear license plate has been removed.

6.  You get a "Good Luck" card from the previous owner.

7.  As you drive up to a service station for gas, the mechanic opens the big door and waves you in.

8.  When you leave for work the next morning, you notice a tow truck parked about a block from your driveway.  As you go by, it silently falls in behind you.

9.  The little "Service Engine" warning signal in the dashboard comes on and reads "Me Again."

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