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More Jokes

  • Owl Jokes

    Owl Friend

    Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night,…
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    More Musings

    What happens if you get scared half to death twice?Energizer Bunny arrested -- charged…
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    Resurrection Update

    A singing group call "The Resurrection" was scheduled to sing at a church.Everyone was…
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    Traffic Camera

    A man was driving when a traffic camera flashed. He thought his picture was taken for…
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    Missed Call

    My daughter Marina worked in my law office while she attended graduate school. One…
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    Sunday Complaints

    After church one Sunday morning, a mother commented, "The choir was awful this…
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    No Hero of Mine

    "King David used to be a hero of mine, but not anymore," little Brodie told his mother…
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    Manager's Project Buzzword Tool

    Are you a manager and behind in your team's project? Here is a handy tool for helping you…
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    Blind Date Slap

    An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to…
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    Out of Gas Advice

    After finishing an out-of-town errand, I discovered that my car wouldn't start because it…
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    Efficiency

    An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don't want to try…
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    Meet the Parents

    A young man looking to get married asked his friend. "Every woman I bring home to meet my…
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    Golf Lesson

    This fellow's wife was constantly nagging him to teach her to play golf. Finally, one…
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    Y2K - Not so Bad

    January 1, 2000 Re: Vacation Pay Dear Valued Employee: Our records indicate that you have…
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    Rejected Invitation

    Mrs. Jones was reading a letter at breakfast. Suddenly she looked up suspiciously at her…

You are probably an elementary school teacher if:

~ You ask guests if they have remembered their scarves and mittens as they leave your home.

~ You move your dinner partner's glass away from the edge of the table.

~ You ask if anyone needs to go to the bathroom as you enter a theater with a group of friends.

~ You hand a tissue to anyone who sneezes.

~ You declare "no cuts" when a shopper squeezes ahead of you in a checkout line.

~ You ask "Are you sure you did your best?" to the mechanic who fails to repair your car to your satisfaction.

~ You sing the "Alphabet Song" to yourself as you look up a number in the phone book.

~ You say everything twice. I mean, you repeat everything.

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