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    You Know You've Been Out of College Too Long When:

    You Know You've Been Out of College Too Long When:* Your potted plants stay alive.* 6:00…
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    1-800-45TEACH

    A high school senior, saw an inspirational advertisement on television about becoming a…
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    Finally

    A man was sleeping when his wife shook him and said, "Wake up, someone is breaking in!"…
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    Still More Bulletin Bloopers

    Several members who have been in the hospital are not on their way to recovery, for which…
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    Goober Mirror

    Two goobers, Carol and Patty, were walking down the street.Carol noticed a compact on the…
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    Redecorating Help

    A young woman decided to redecorate her bedroom. She wasn't sure how many rolls of…
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    Goober Airlines

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:…
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    More Church Bulletin Humor

    *More Church Bulletin Humor* Sermon Outline:I. Delineate your fearII. Disown your…
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    Dead Seagull

    A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old son ran up to him,…
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    The Mayor's Burden

    One of the burdens of office of the small town mayor was his brother in-law, a fellow who…
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    Tracing Family

    Dear Abby:I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to…
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    Poor Dad

    A father worked as an accountant for the Air National Guard. Despite a regular adequate…
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    Dining In

    My husband and I both work, so our family eats out a lot.Recently, when we were having a…
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    Compliments to the Chef

    I have a reputation for not being a fantastic cook. One evening I worked particularly…
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    Isn't That Nice?

    Two delicate flowers of Southern womanhood (one of whom was from Texas) were conversing…
1.  During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.

2.  He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser."

3.  When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

4.  He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

5.  During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.

6.  A prison guard is shaving your head.

7.  He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.

8.  He begins closing arguments with, "As Ally McBeal once said ..."

9.  He keeps citing the legal case of Godzilla v.  Mothra.

10.  Just before he says "Your Honor," he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.

11.  The sign in front of his law office reads "Practicing Law Since 2:25 PM."

12.  Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever."

13.  Just before trial starts he whispers, "The judge is the one with the little hammer, right?"
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