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    What "Guy" Phrases Really Mean

    "I'm going fishing."really means..."I'm going to go and stand by a stream with a stick in…
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    Day Off From School

    On Monday a call came in to the school receptionist. "Hello. Please mark William absent…
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    Lariat Training

    More than anything, Bob wanted to be a cowpoke. Taking pity on him, a rancher decided to…
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    Technical Terms for the Strictly Amish

    Log on: making a wood stove hotterLog off: don't add no more woodMonitor: keeping an eye…
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    Back In My Day

    For those of us who remember the good old days. In my day, we didn't have no rocks. We…
  • woman desk

    The Importance of Correct Punctuation

    We've all been told how important it is to use correct punctuation. Well, here is a…
  • birthday2

    Jury Age

    Just as she was celebrating her 80th birthday, our friend received a jury-duty notice.…
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    Getting Fat

    When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room…
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    Check The Mirror

    Harry was in his usual place in the morning sitting at the table, reading the paper after…
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    Actual Call Center Conversations

    Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries.…
  • A dad gives his daughter getting a shoulder ride.

    But Daddy

    My husband and I took our two-year-old daughter to the home-improvement store. Madison…
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    One Man Team

    (Note: It's just a joke so change the name of the teams as it suits you.) The Redskins…
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    Vet Bills

    While waiting at the veterinarian's office, I overheard two women chatting about their…
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    Mess Sign

    A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, "Don't Waste Food -- Food will win the…
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    The Vending Machine

    A goober named Laura is at a local zoo and comes across a vending machine, which she has…
You can't board the plane unless you have the exact change.

Before you take off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro.

The Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.

When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.

The Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.

You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he says, "Just once."

No movie.  Don't need one.  Your life keeps flashing before your eyes.

You see a man with a gun, but he's demanding to be let off the plane.

All the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.
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