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More Jokes

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    One-liners

    1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.2. Make yourself at home! Clean my…
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    Answering Machine Messages

    *Answering Machine Messages*Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already…
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    Swindled

    A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it.…
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    Chopsticks

    A man having lunch at a Chinese restaurant noticed that the table had been set with…
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    Bump Start

    About five years ago the battery in my beat-up VW Beetle had died because I left the…
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    Rattlesnakes

    Felix, my husband, was playing golf with our town's fire chief when he hit a ball into…
  • chanel-no-5

    Wrong Chanel

    The man walked over to the perfume counter and told the clerk he'd like a bottle of…
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    Quick Proposal

    At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he…
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    Does It Hurt?

    When I was a mother's helper, the mom of the family I worked for sat with her three…
  • A young boy watches his dad help birth a calf.

    Calf Birth

    A man was helping one of his cows give birth when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing…
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    Prison Joke Book

    It was Mickey's first night in the penitentiary. All of the inmates were in their cells…
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    Hurry Home

    It has to be confessed that the minister was rather long-winded. During his sermon a…
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    Goober 911

    Q: Why can't goobers dial 911?A: They can't find the "11" on the phone!
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    Things You Do Not Want To Hear In Surgery

    1.) Better save that.? We'll need it for the autopsy.2.) Somebody call the janitor -…
  • family time

    Supporting a Family

    Jake had proposed to young Gina and was being interviewed by his prospective…

Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father's annoyance. "Teddy," he called, "how many more times have I got to tell you to come downstairs quietly? Now, go back upstairs and come down like a civilized human being."

There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room. "That's better," said his father, "now in future will you always come down stairs like that."

"Suits me," said Teddy. "I slid down the railing."

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