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  • new years_eve_white_hat

    Newlywed Compromise

    For our first New Year's together as a married couple, my wife offered me a choice of…
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    Thanksgiving Blessing

    May your stuffing be tasty, May your holiday turkey be plump, May your potatoes ‘n gravy…
  • store sign

    Don't Have Any

    A woman walks into a convenience store. She walks straight to the manager and asks, "Do…
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    Ignored Phone

    The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it…
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    Confession

    A young girl once confessed to her priest that she thought she was guilty of the sin of…
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    Raise Request

    Employee: I have been here 11 years doing three men's work for one man's pay. Now I want…
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    You Know You Are Over the Hill When

    1. You find yourself beginning to like accordion music. 2. You're sitting on a park bench…
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    Water Pistol

    When my three-year-old son opened the birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a…
  • picture of a hang glider

    Zeek's Hang Glider

    In the back woods of Gooberland, you don't see too many people hang-gliding. Ol' Zeek,…
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    Tips For The Clueless

    Some Tips for the Clueless If you're bidding on a job for UPS, don't send your bid by…
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    Department Baseball

    An interoffice softball game was held every year between the marketing and support staff…
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    Fair Tax

    At a business conference in Montpelier, Vermont, the state tax commissioner asked the…
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    Matchmaker

    Barbie, a waitress, decided to put her matchmaking skills to the test with our mutual…
  • Pictures of a Mother's Day Frame

    Mother Quotes

    PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight…
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    Thai This For a Change

    An elderly couple, Marty and Helen, along with some friends agreed to try a Thai…

1.  Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers.

2.  Bandage left thumb.

3.  Chop other fragments into smaller fragments

4.  Bandage left foot.

5.  Make structure of slivers (include those embedded in hand)

6.  Light Match

7.  Light Match

8.  Repeat "a Scout is cheerful" and light match.

9.  Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of fire.

10.  Apply burn ointment to nose.

11.  When fire is burning, collect more wood.

12.  Upon discovering that fire has gone out while out searching for more wood, soak wood from can labeled "kerosene."

13.  Treat face and arms for second-degree burns.

14.  Relabel can to read "gasoline."

15.  When fire is burning well, add all remaining firewood.

16.  When thunder storm has passed, repeat steps.

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