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More Jokes

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    Hooked Shot

    Jack was first up in his foursome. Eyeing the ball, he swung his club and hooked his shot…
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    Horseshoe Look

    One day a cowboy walked into a blacksmith shop and picked up a horseshoe, not realizing…
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    All Saved Up

    After years of scrimping and saving, a husband told his wife the good news: "Honey, we've…
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    Stupid Inventions

    Stupid Inventions: - Black Highlighter - Braille Driver's Manual - Clear Correction Fluid…
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    50 Years From Now

    Three elderly gents were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about…
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    Wig Eye Witness

    While my friend was working as a receptionist for an eye surgeon, a very angry woman…
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    Dog Rules

    Basic Rules for Dogs Who Have a Yard To Protect NEWSPAPERS: If you have to go to the…
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    Aging

    ~ Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall…
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    Dieting Buddies

    Mary announced that she was going to start a diet to lose some pounds she had put on…
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    Friendly Pig

    A man was on a walking holiday in a foreign country. He became thirsty so decided to ask…
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    Bakery Robbery

    My cousin was behind the bakery's cash register one morning when a gunman burst in and…
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    Bricklayer's Insurance Claim

    I am writing in response to your request for additional information. In block number…
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    Simple Support

    Last week my wife and I purchased a new computer. We ran into some difficulties while…
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    Coffee Cool

    I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee. I asked the…

1.  Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers.

2.  Bandage left thumb.

3.  Chop other fragments into smaller fragments

4.  Bandage left foot.

5.  Make structure of slivers (include those embedded in hand)

6.  Light Match

7.  Light Match

8.  Repeat "a Scout is cheerful" and light match.

9.  Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of fire.

10.  Apply burn ointment to nose.

11.  When fire is burning, collect more wood.

12.  Upon discovering that fire has gone out while out searching for more wood, soak wood from can labeled "kerosene."

13.  Treat face and arms for second-degree burns.

14.  Relabel can to read "gasoline."

15.  When fire is burning well, add all remaining firewood.

16.  When thunder storm has passed, repeat steps.

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