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    $100 Coffee

    A street person approached a passer-by and said, "Sir, would you give me $100 for a cup…
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    New Brain Study

    A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that…
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    4 Year Old Rider

    Mother asks little Johnny, as they wait for the bus, to tell the driver he is 4 years old…
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    Expecting

    A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following…
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    Perfectly Made

    When we put our house up for sale, I stressed emphatically that my sons make their beds…
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    Vulgar Parrot

    So there's this fella with a parrot. And this parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's a…
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    Clergy Crowd Control

    A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the…
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    Fishing Advice

    Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then, another…
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    The Magician and The Parrot

    A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different…
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    Dog Barking Payback

    A wife and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has…
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    Grandpa's Manners

    "Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the modish young lady. "What's to be proud of?"…
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    Things My Mother Taught Me

    My Mother taught me LOGIC..."If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go…
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    Serious Shopper

    I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation. Just…
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    Headlines from 2050

    *Headlines from 2050* Florida to Be Re-admitted to Union Plague of Spotted Owls Threaten…
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    Rare Bible

    A collector of rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had just thrown away…

book ideaEGOCENTRIC: a person who believes he is everything you know you are.

MAGAZINE: bunch of printed pages that tell you what's coming in the next issue.

EMERGENCY NUMBERS: police station, fire department and places that deliver.

OPERA: when a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding he sings.

BUFFET: a French word that means, "Get up and get it yourself."

BABY-SITTER: a teenager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teenagers.

TRAFFIC LIGHT: apparatus that automatically turns red when your car approaches.

PIONEER: early American who was lucky enough to find his way out of the woods.

PEOPLE: some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority have no idea what's happened.

SWIMMING POOL: a mob of people with water in it.

SELF-CONTROL: the ability to eat only one peanut.

TATTOO: permanent proof of temporary insanity.

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