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    Signs Found In The Kitchen

    So this isn't Home Sweet Home ... Adjust! Martha Stewart doesn't live here!! Ring bell…
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    The Haircut

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    Words to Ponder

    *Words to Ponder* Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. I'd kill…
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    Pig Feed

    There was a farmer who had many pigs. One day someone went to the farm and asked the…
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    Crossing Lesson

    There's a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming…
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    Exercise Pill

    "I'm prescribing these pills for you," said the doctor to the overweight patient who…
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    Intercom Repair

    My friend's son worked at a fast-food restaurant when he was in high school. One night…
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    Cafeteria Sign

    Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of…
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    Ah, Newlyweds

    There are never any secrets! A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached,…
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    Goodbye From George

    George had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out his Last Will and…
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    Vow Changes

    Ken and Melba had finished their breakfast at the retirement home and were relaxing in…
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    Traffic Camera

    A man was driving when a traffic camera flashed. He thought his picture was taken for…
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    Nervous Preacher

    A new preacher had just begun his sermon. He was a little nervous and about ten minutes…
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    Summer Plans

    Summer vacation was almost about to start and the teacher asked little Sammy about a…
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    Deer Prayer

    The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season. The…

If you MUST speed on the highway, sing these hymns loudly:

at 45 mph.... "God Will Take Care of Me"

at 55 mph.... "Guide me, O Great Jehovah"

at 65 mph.... "Nearer My God to Thee"

at 75 mph.... "Nearer Still Nearer"

at 85 mph.... "This World is Not My Home"

at 95 mph.... "Lord, I'm Coming Home"

at 100 mph.... "Precious Memories"

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