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    Too Distant / Too Close

    The showers in my daughter's dorm turned scalding hot whenever a toilet was flushed. To…
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    Supermarket Saavy

    One day my brother-in-law noticed an elderly lady slowly pushing a cart through the…
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    Sewing Lesson

    My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to…
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    The Top Ten Things Not to Do at Your Child's Performance or Sports Event

    10. Try to pep up the dance recital crowd by starting "the wave." 9. Do a halftime…
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    Johnny Hollers

    Coming through the door after school one day, Little Johnny hollers out, "Okay everyone…
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    Useful Work Phrases

    1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 2. I like…
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    Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Turkey

    Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Turkey: Ingedients: - 1 large turkey - 1 small turkey…
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    Overdue at the Movies

    Tired from waiting for their overdue baby, my daughter and her husband broke the monotony…
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    $50 Question

    A scientist and a poet were traveling in the same compartment on a train. They had never…
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    Losing Load

    A trucker stops for red light and a goober girl catches up. She knocks on the door and…
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    Grandma and Computer

    The computer's swallowed grandmaYes' honestly' its true.She pressed 'control' and…
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    Long Passwords

    My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on…
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    Paid To Worry

    Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. Now he…
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    Home Donations

    A tired homemaker opened the front door of her home to find a young minister from the…
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    Late Excuse

    Harry came into the office an hour late for the third time in a week. "What's the story…

During a sermon one Sunday, the pastor heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and disturbing people.

He interrupted his sermon and announced sternly, "There are two of you here who have not heard a word I've said." That quieted them down.

When the service was over, he went to greet people at the front door. Three different adults apologized for going to sleep in church, promising it would never happen again.

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