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    Border problem

    An elderly woman lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota…
  • Queen Elizabeth with Gun

    Revocation of Independence

    Remember when the US election took so long to decide back in November of 2000? Here's a…
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    Hard to Pronounce

    As a Dominican sister, I lived in a convent named for a deceased pope. One day while I…
  • picture of elderly couple

    Sharing

    Uncle Sid and Aunt Sadie are in their eighties and have been married for more than sixty…
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    Wrapping Presents With A Cat

    Wrapping Presents With A Cat1. Clear large space on table for wrapping present.2. Go to…
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    Application To Date My Daughter

    NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unlessaccompanied by a complete…
  • curlers

    Hair Curlers

    My wife still uses curlers in her hair after she washes it. The other night she came into…
  • sick

    Sick Days

    It was the toughest experience of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then…
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    Steeple Paint

    The church steeple in Port Gibson is very high, and was being painted on a rather hot…
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    One-Liners

    If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Nothing in the known universe…
  • father and children

    New Survivor

    Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show? Here's the details: - 6 Married…
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    Perfect Spouse

    A young lady visited a computer dating service and requested, "I'm looking for a spouse.…
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    Kid Say

    The best laughs I have known in life have been from my own children. I have captured…
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    High Blood Pressure

    A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basic…
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    Dog Calls

    Bernard, who is noted for his gracious manners, was awakened one morning at four forty…

A ragged individual stranded for several months on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.

Rushing to the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands withdrew the message.

"Due to lack of maintenance," he read, "we regretfully have found it necessary to cancel your e-mail account."

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