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More Jokes

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    One Parachute

    You are one of "two" people on a malfunctioning airplane with only one parachute. How…
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    Worker Ants

    The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural history lesson. "Worker…
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    Bus Pole

    While riding the bus, my mother noticed a young man, who was holding onto the same pole,…
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    Sixteen Steps to Build a Campfire

    1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left…
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    Comments Never Heard at Church

    1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed…
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    Goober Guess

    This goober named Jed was walking down the road one day when he came across his friend,…
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    Tree Trouble

    Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the buds on my father's young peach tree for two…
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    Car 34

    A young man is an avid listener to the city's police frequency, and he leaves the scanner…
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    Cool In The Desert

    Two guys met in the middle of the desert. One was carrying a car door, the other an…
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    First Grade Proverbs

    A first grade teacher collected old, well known proverbs. She gave each kid in her class…
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    Open Mouth, Insert Foot

    At the outpatient surgery center where I work, the anesthesiologist often chatted with…
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    Movie Night

    My wife was complaining that I spend too much time on the computer, and not enough time…
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    Crossing Chicken

    Question: Why did the chicken cross the road? Answers: KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to…
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    The Law of Parenthood

    There is the Law of Gravity - and then, there is the Law of Parenthood- A child's…
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    The Importance of Correct Punctuation

    We've all been told how important it is to use correct punctuation. Well, here is a…

*Strange 911 Calls*

A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share a hotel room and there weren't enough towels.

A man called 911 and said: "Please connect me to Switzerland."

A lady called 911 because of a fight going on in a parking lot. When asked to describe the combatants, she said: "I'll try. There's one man, and he's dressed like Elvis. He's kicking another man who's laying on the ground and screaming 'You Ain't nothing but a hound dog.'"

Another person called to report he had the hiccups.

A thirteen-year-old boy called to report he had "stuff" coming from his navel. Paramedics examined the boy and all they found was belly-button lint.

A male complainant called and requested police call gas stations on all exits of I-95 to find out which ones were open.

A woman called emergency to report she had seen a wild mouse in her house.

Someone called 911 to report the parrot got out of his cage and is in a tree outside.

A man broke up with his girlfriend and wanted police to go by her house and report to him the owners of any cars, other than hers, in her driveway.

A man called to report he had a roach stuck in his ear.

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