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    Call Me Leroy

    Uncle Leroy got a job down at the broom factory. On his first day the straw boss (floor…
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    Lost Bible

    The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.…
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    Bad Day Sign

    You know it's going to be a bad day when your teenager knocks on your bedroom door first…
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    'Coons From Heaven

    MILLEDGEVILLE, Ga. (AP) - Brad Davis was training his puppy to pick up the scent of a…
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    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary:Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am…
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    The Top 15 Lines You'll Never Hear in a Western

    15 "I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist."14 "Gentlemen, rather…
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    Goober Quotes

    I got some bad news today. You know the money you get from those ATM machines? It comes…
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    Actual Warnings On Products

    *Actual Warnings On Products* On instructions for a hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.…
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    Signs that the Starship Enterprise is Nearing the End of It's Warranty

    - Impulse engines stall when used in reverse.- Digital speedometer on helm console stuck…
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    First Date Nerves

    A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks…
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    What He Says - What He Means

    What He Says - What He Means"I'm going fishing."Really means: "I'm going to stand by a…
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    Dead Politicians

    A bus of politicians is driving by a farm where a man lives alone. The bus driver, caught…
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    Captain Comeback

    I worked in the biology department at Buffalo State College in New York. The Great Lakes…
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    Goober Exam

    The Goober reported for her University final examination, which consisted of"yes/no" type…
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    Stain Glass

    An area pastor tells of his first Sunday in the new parish and presenting the children's…

weight scale 2I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach.

Thinking he was trying to weigh less with this maneuver, I quipped, "I don't think that is going to help much, hon."

"Sure it does," he said.

"How else can I see the numbers?"

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