logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Survivalist Training

A Scoutmaster was teaching his Boy Scouts about survival in the Alaskan wilderness.

"What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost alone in the woods?" he asked.

Several hands went up, and many important things were mentioned, such as water, matches, etc.

Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand.

"Yes, Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring?" asked the Scoutmaster.

Timmy replied, "A compass, food, and a deck of cards."

"Why's that, Timmy?" the Scoutmaster inquired.

"The compass is to find the right direction, and the food is to maintain you during the rescue."

"And what about the playing cards, Timmy?" asked the Scoutmaster impatiently.

"Well, sir, as soon as you start playing solitaire, someone always walks up behind you and says, "Put that red nine on top of that black ten!"

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Ring Appraisal

    An acquaintance of mine whose daughter was about to be married decided to give her a…
  • Default Image

    Jumper

    At the local Starbucks, a little guy exchanged words with a big bald guy and it looked…
  • Default Image

    Computer Repair

    An office technician got a call from a computer user. The user told the tech that her…
  • Default Image

    TV News

    A chicken crosses the road. Here's how some of the media covers it.Here's our trusty NBC…
  • painter

    If Airlines Sold Paint

    Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot…
  • Default Image

    Ten Things A Cat Thinks About

    *Ten Things A Cat Thinks About*1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.2. Is there…
  • Default Image

    Know Your Friends

    One day, a little boy visited a doctor for a vaccination. After the doctor gave him an…
  • Default Image

    Chain Fired

    A guy walks into the human resources department of a large company and hands the…
  • Default Image

    Picture Favor

    Dining out one evening, I noticed six teenagers boisterously celebrating some event at a…
  • Default Image

    When One Shows Up

    A preacher prepared for Sunday morning service, but only one person, a farmer, was there.…
  • Default Image

    George W. meets Moses

    George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white robe with a…
  • man laugh

    Funny Quotes

    Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.- Red Buttons Did…
  • Default Image

    You Know You Are From Arizona When

    You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.You can endure 110 degrees without…
  • Default Image

    Tea Service

    One day my mother was out and my dad was looking after me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old…
  • Default Image

    Forklift Economy

    After being laid off from three jobs in the past year, Dewey was hired to work in a…