logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Survivalist Training

A Scoutmaster was teaching his Boy Scouts about survival in the Alaskan wilderness.

"What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost alone in the woods?" he asked.

Several hands went up, and many important things were mentioned, such as water, matches, etc.

Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand.

"Yes, Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring?" asked the Scoutmaster.

Timmy replied, "A compass, food, and a deck of cards."

"Why's that, Timmy?" the Scoutmaster inquired.

"The compass is to find the right direction, and the food is to maintain you during the rescue."

"And what about the playing cards, Timmy?" asked the Scoutmaster impatiently.

"Well, sir, as soon as you start playing solitaire, someone always walks up behind you and says, "Put that red nine on top of that black ten!"
Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Kiss The Mirror Good-Bye

    According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with an unique problem:A…
  • Default Image

    Fore!

    My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game. "You have to count my…
  • Default Image

    Insured Voice

    A cantor, the man who sings the prayers at a synagogue, brags before his congregation in…
  • Default Image

    Eggplant Sale

    A grocer put up a sign that read "Eggplants, 25ยข ea.--three for a dollar."All day long,…
  • Default Image

    Bulletin Humor

    I hope the bulletin in your church is more accurate than the ones that these occurred in.…
  • gift

    Top 10 Holiday Gift Things To Say

    Top 10 things to say about a holiday gift you don't like: 10) Hey! There's a gift. 9.)…
  • form

    Vacation Time

    Jill had applied for a job and when she returned home, her mother asked how the interview…
  • Default Image

    Weddings and Funerals

    Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling…
  • Default Image

    Ah, Newlyweds

    There are never any secrets! A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached,…
  • coffee break

    Office Culture

    The boss joined a group of his workers at the coffee urn and told a series of jokes he'd…
  • Default Image

    Charity Better than Expected

    Members of the Methodist women's church circle in one Wisconsin town some years ago were…
  • Default Image

    Scale Convention

    At the scale manufacturers' convention, people often wanted to weigh themselves on…
  • Default Image

    Stern Announcement

    During a sermon one Sunday, the pastor heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and…
  • Default Image

    Innocent Question

    A prosecuting attorney just could not believe that a jury had found the defendant not…
  • Default Image

    Lobster Pets

    After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two…