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  • airplane1

    Captain Discipline

    About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a…
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    Gifts for Men

    Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules…
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    Hybrid Car

    My uncle in Detroit tried to make a new kind of car. He took the engine from a Ford, the…
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    Golf Survey

    My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18…
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    Are We There Yet?

    The little old lady seated herself right behind the bus driver. Every ten minutes or so…
  • suitcases

    No Contraband

    After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother…
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    Prescription Change

    An old man strode in to his doctors office and said, "Doc, my druggist said to tell you…
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    Flight Advice

    On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window. Since it was…
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    Married Witness

    An uncertain and nervous witness was being cross-examined. The lawyer thundered at him,…
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    Animal Thoughts

    Dog: "They keep putting the lid down on the big water bowl." Goldfish: "Just because I…
  • rifle range

    Rifle Tech Support

    It was decided at Microsoft, during a brilliant brainstorming session, that military…
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    Exercise Program

    Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor…
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    Keyboard Switch

    For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers…
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    Computer Repair

    An office technician got a call from a computer user. The user told the tech that her…
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    Vacation Cut

    Before going on vacation, I decided on the spur of the moment to have my very long,…

There was an unexpected knock on my door, and like I always do I first opened the peephole and asked, "Who's there?"

"Parcel post, ma'am. I have a package that needs a signature."

"Where's the package?" I asked suspiciously. The deliveryman held it up.

"Could I see some ID?" I said, still not convinced.

"Lady," he replied wearily, "if I wanted to break into your house, I'd probably just use these." And he pulled out the keys I had left in the door.

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