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    Tonsils

    A young boy of four was going into hospital to have his tonsils removed. He told his…
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    Dumb Sports Quotes

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    Kidnapped

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    Turtle Ears

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    Baby Wrap

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    Holding A Job

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    Overworked

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    The Mayor's Burden

    One of the burdens of office of the small town mayor was his brother in-law, a fellow who…
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    Wheat Exports

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    Lost Over Washington State

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    Sidewalk Preacher

    A sidewalk preacher stood on a soapbox downtown and started a rousing sermon on…
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    Marriage Wakeup

    As Barb was getting to know David and his family, she was very impressed by how much his…
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    Natural Antibiotic

    While serving as associate pastor in a church in the California gold country, I had an…
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    Out-of-Office Replies

    I don't know about you, but I find those "Out-of-the-Office" e-mail auto-replies very…
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    8-Year-Old Asks

    An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy,…

You know you're a retiree-to-be when...

1. Fellow staff members greet you in the hall with, "Oh!  Stop smiling!"

2. You get up to the checkout counter at Borders, and you realize you're buying books you won't need next year.

3. Your file cabinets are getting lighter, and your circular file is getting heavier.

4. You find yourself saying, "Yes!" whenever an administrator or union officer asks you to be on a committee next year.

5. The custodian has complained to the principal that the trash he removes daily from your room is 10 to 20 times greater than any other room in the building - including the cafeteria.

6. You get in line at the copy machine, and realize you don't have anything to copy.

7. The teachers in the grade below you complain about how horrible their kids are, and you just smile.

8. The principal comes in for the final observation of the year, and you throw a party for your class with lots of snacks, games, and a visit from Frankie the clown.

9. You constantly find other teachers in your room measuring bookcases.

10. You respond to every new initiative with, "Been there!  Done that!"

11. When the parent, who has complained about every teacher her kid has ever had, comes up to you and says, "My son is hoping to get you next year," you just smile!

12. On your way to the parking lot, you look up at the sky, and see 3 or 4 recent college graduates circling overhead.

13. Other staff members complain that they can't get into the rest room because you're always in there, laughing hysterically.

14. Behind you, as you're driving out of the parking lot, you hear the faint ringing of the dismissal bell.

15. Your final comments on the June report card are, "Bye!"

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