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More Jokes

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    Mechanic Applicant

    A man is applying for a job as mechanic that he really wants to get.The boss says, "Can…
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    Goober Dieter

    A goober was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat…
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    All Roads Lead Back to Rome

    The U.S. Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.…
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    The Truth About Tools

    The Truth about Tools HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays…
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    Get Well Soon

    A motorcycle cop was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix.The doctors…
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    E-Mail Blessing

    E-Mail BlessingPeace be unto you, your computer and the e-mail you receive this day.May…
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    Cool In The Desert

    Two guys met in the middle of the desert. One was carrying a car door, the other an…
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    I'll Call Back

    Leaving Montreal for Quebec, I decided to make a stop at one of those rest areas on the…
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    Play-Off Tickets

    A man goes to the Chicago Bear ticket office and inquires about purchasing play-off…
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    Goober Y2K Date Change Project Status:

    Y-to-K Date Change Project Status: Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time…
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    Airline Announcements

    Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture"…
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    How Business Communications Work

    How Business Communications WorkMEMORANDUMFrom: Headquarters - New YorkTo: General…
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    Rank Explanation

    My brother Ken was home on leave from his post in Hawaii, when he announced that he had…
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    The Law of Parenthood

    There is the Law of Gravity - and then, there is the Law of Parenthood- A child's…
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    Chicken Answers

    Before you get to today‚Äôs supersized CleanLaugh, a bit down this e-mail (post number…

I'd love to, but...

1 I have to floss my cat.

2 I've dedicated my life to linguini.

3 I want to spend more time with my blender.

4 The President said he might drop in.

5 The man on television told me to say tuned.

6 I've been scheduled for a eyelash transplant.

7 I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.

8 It's my parakeet's bowling night.

9 It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.

10 I'm building a pig from a kit.

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