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More Jokes

  • tortoise

    Holding A Job

    A young man was a very slow worker and subsequently found it difficult to hold down a…
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    Facilities Memo

    My colleagues and I recently received this email from the facilities department:"Due to…
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    "Grace"ous Host

    A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old…
  • speech bubble

    Famous Last Words

    *Famous Last Words* *Ha! They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist... *Don't unplug it,…
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    The Littlest Informant

    As a recently divorced police officer, and new to the dating scene, I was thrilled but…
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    Favorite Flower

    While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Tom and his wife Peg listened to the…
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    Work P-p-p-p-p-roblem

    A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and…
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    Housework Challenged

    One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.Seconds after he…
  • man3

    Your Turn

    A woman stood inside the front door, her arms full of coats. Four small children scurried…
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    You Know It's Time To Turn Your Computer Off When

    You know it's time to turn your computer off and read a book when ....... 1. A friend…
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    The Next One

    After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband…
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    Name Confusion

    Working at an airline ticket counter, I pulled up a passenger's reservation that showed…
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    Birth Wharp

    Stationed in Okinawa, Japan, my son and his wife were expecting their first baby. I was…
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    Card Name

    A customer called the airline's reservation office to pay for his ticket with a credit…
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    Politically Correct Statements

    Your bedroom isn't cluttered, it's just "passage restrictive." Kids don't get grounded…

I'd love to, but...

1 I have to floss my cat.

2 I've dedicated my life to linguini.

3 I want to spend more time with my blender.

4 The President said he might drop in.

5 The man on television told me to say tuned.

6 I've been scheduled for a eyelash transplant.

7 I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.

8 It's my parakeet's bowling night.

9 It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.

10 I'm building a pig from a kit.

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