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More Jokes

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    Sticking Out

    At our daughter's high school graduation, I couldn't help noticing a young man sporting a…
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    Funeral Music

    At our local crematorium families are given the chance to chose the music CD they would…
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    Anti-Burglar Signs

    The following are a few simple ways to keep burglars out of the house by putting a few…
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    Country Boys

    These two country boys, brothers, were knocking around one lazy summer day and thought it…
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    Bungee Jumping

    Two entrepreneurs, Jack and John, decided to start a bungee-jumping business south of the…
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    Lunch On The Bank

    A pastor and two of his deacons are out on the river fishing in their rowboat. Twelve…
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    Sorry I'm Late

    Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy…
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    Dignified Exit

    One evening, two girlfriends and I went to a nightclub, only to find the place packed…
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    Frugal - to save

    Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her…
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    Library Confusion

    The college football player knew his way around the locker room better than he did the…
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    Glass Honesty

    As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses."I really only need…
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    Need a Push

    A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over…
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    One Per Point

    One day a professor was giving a big test to his students. He handed out all of the tests…
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    Pastors' Good News/Bad News

    Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.Bad News: You lost two of them in…
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    Seeing Eye Dog

    A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing eye dog one day. When they come to…

*Ten Things A Cat Thinks About*

1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.

2. Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?

3. Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?

4. I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ulterior motives?

5. Hmmm... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can't we cats ever get these stupid dogs to do anything for us?

6. This looks like a good spot for a nap.

7. Hey -- no kidding, I'm sure that's the can opener.

8. Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?

9. If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?

10. If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to let them know who's boss!

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