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More Jokes

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    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary:Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am…
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    Happy Birthday Line

    Because of a minor infraction, a shipmate of mine aboard the USS Reeves, bound for Japan,…
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    Perfect Spouse

    A young lady visited a computer dating service and requested, "I'm looking for a spouse.…
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    It Might Be Cleaner

    After trying for hours to get my daughters to clean their room, I burst in and yelled,…
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    Open Microphone

    While my son was on the Navy carrier USS George Washington, the air wing was busy with…
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    Manservant

    Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next…
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    Leaky Pipe

    A lady answered her front door to find a plumber standing there. "I'm here to fix the…
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    Workplace Insanity

    How to keep a healthy level of insanity in the workplace…
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    Brave Firefighters

    A fire started on some grassland near a farm in Indiana. The fire department from the…
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    Top Ten Signs You Might Have a Bad Furnace Repair Guy

    10. His face permanently blackened like a cartoon bomb went off 9. Pushes his personal…
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    Texas Vacation

    A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. "It sounds as if you had a…
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    Analytical Gunfighters

    Two analytical chemists in the Wild West are on the town's main street, ready to draw…
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    Doctor News

    A doctor walked into his office where one of his patients was sitting. The doctor told…
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    Don't Smoke

    A couple of hours into a visit with my mother, she noticed I hadn't once lit up a…
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    Deck Praise

    I was working in the sun all day, putting finishing touches on the new deck outside my…

Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

1. Text on Web pages displays as Morse Code

2. Graphics arrive via FedEx

3. You believe a heavier string might improve your connection

4. You post a message to your favorite newsgroup and it displays a week later

5. Your credit card expires while ordering online

6. ESPN Web site exhibits "Heisman Trophy Winner"...for 1989

7. You're still in the middle of downloading that popular new game, "Pac Man"

8. Everyone you talk to on the 'net phone' sounds like Forrest Gump

9. You receive e-mails with stamps on them

10. When you click the "Send" button, a little door opens on the side of your monitor and a pigeon flies out.

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