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More Jokes

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    Bloopers in the Media

    "Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound."- Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange…
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    Sisters at the Superbowl

    Two elderly sisters donated $25 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to the…
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    Retirement Savings

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    Get Me Out

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    Hostage Situation

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    Baseball Basics

    At one point during a game, the baseball coach said to one of his young players, "Do you…
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    Pygmy Hunter

    A Hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing…
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    CIA, FBI & LAPD

    The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove…
  • barber pole

    Duelling Barbers

    A new hair salon opened up for business right across the street from the old established…
  • chickens

    Chickens in the Sack

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. There were two…
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    One Hard Question

    There was a student who wanted to be admitted to the University.He was smart enough to…
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    Insurance Claims

    These are from insurance forms in which drivers were asked to explain their disasters in…
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    More Murphy's Laws of Law Enforcement

    To err is human, just do it in front of as few people as possible! Anyone that flirts…
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    Waking Up

    This week a man awoke from a coma that had lasted for 62 years. His first question was,…

The Company Car...

1. It accelerates at a phenomenal rate.

2. It has a much shorter braking distance than the private car.

3. It can take speed humps at twice the speed of private cars.

4. The battery , radiator water, oil and tires never have to be checked.

5. The floor is cunningly designed to double as an ashtray.

6. It does not need to be kept under shelter at night.

7. It can be driven up to 60 miles with the oil warning light flashing.

8. It needs cleaning less often than private cars.

9. The suspension is reinforced to allow for the weekend loads of bricks, concrete slabs and other building material.

10. Unusual and alarming engine noises are easily eliminated by turning up the radio.

11. It needs no security system and may be left anywhere, unlocked and with the keys in the ignition.

12. It is the only type of car able to leave the road in game reserves and chase after animals in the bush for a closer look.

13. It is especially sand and waterproof for barbeques and fishing expeditions on remote beaches.

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