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More Jokes

  • chocolate1

    Chocolate Calories

    A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy 2 servings per night, and a…
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    Tough Teacher

    A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of…
  • How to be handy around the house - in 10 easy steps.

    Ten Step Guide to Being Handy Around the House

    1. If you can't find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break off the tip, it's an…
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    At Home

    While I was dining out with my children, a man came over to our table, and we started…
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    Bakery Robbery

    My cousin was behind the bakery's cash register one morning when a gunman burst in and…
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    Sugar Packets Announcement

    The Building Committee has been informed that opened sugar packets are being found in the…
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    Whispering In Church

    A mother took her little boy to church.While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I…
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    You Know You Are a Geek When

    You know you are a geek when . . .You look at a movie trailer and think, "I have that…
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    New Phonetic Alphabet

    The same old standard phonetic alphabet (which you would use to describe spelling…
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    Turkey Shopping

    It was Christmas Eve in a supermarket and a woman was anxiously picking over the last few…
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    Bus Fare to Train Station

    Before boarding a bus, a man asked the driver, "What is the fare to the train station?"…
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    Ironic Phone Call

    A guy showed up at church with both of his ears burned. His chum asked, "what happened to…
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    Famous Last Words

    * Don't turn it on yet, it's not quite ready.* Step back a bit, I can't get you in the…
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    Verbalized Prayers

    The pastor of a mid-sized church decided one Monday morning that the staff would…
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    Computer T-Shirt Slogans - #1

    Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.As a computer, I find your faith in technology…
The confused goober:

1.  Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

2.  Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

3.  Can't work in a pharmacy because the bottles won't fit into the typewriter.

4.  Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in six months and the box said "2 to 4 years."

5.  Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

6.  Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on the phone.

7.  When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C."

8.  Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.

9.  Can't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets.

10.  Hates M&Ms because they are so hard to peel.

11.  Got hurt while raking leaves: She fell out of the tree.

12.  Changes the baby's diaper only once a month because the label said up to 20 pounds.
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