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    Excerpts From "A Cat's Guide To Human Beings"

    1. Introduction: Why Do We Need Humans?So you've decided to get yourself a human being.…
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    Three Important Words

    At my granddaughter's wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married…
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    Deer Prayer

    The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season.Or…
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    Prison Sentence

    Jimmy was sent to prison for his crimes but he told the warden he wasn't worried at all…
  • picture of seeing eye dog

    Can You See Me?

    I'm a counselor who helps coordinate support groups for visually-impaired adults. Many…
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    Police Rescue

    I remember the day when a police car pulled up to Grandma's house and Grandpa got out.…
  • chicken cooked

    Chicken Recipe

    Baked Stuffed Chicken 6-7 lb. chicken1 cup melted butter1 cup stuffing1 cup uncooked…
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    Dollar Math

    "If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you…
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    The End is Near

    A local priest and pastor stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, "The…
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    Movie Impatience

    We went to the movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it…
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    Rabbi Schwartz Answers His Phone

    "Hello is this Rabbi Schwartz?" "It is" "This is the IRS. Can you help us?" "I can." "Do…
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    Thunderstorm Plea

    An airliner flew into a violent thunderstorm and was soon swaying and bumping around the…
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    Something Nice For Dad

    Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his…
  • couple argue2

    Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

    Breaking Up Is Hard To Do...(especially when you share the same major!) PSYCHOLOGY: Girl…
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    Feeding the Baby

    My husband is wonderful with our baby daughter, but often he turns to me for advice.…

Proofreading is an important job in many different fields.~ IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you are one of hundreds of parachuting enthusiasts who bought our Easy Sky Diving book, please make the following correction: on page 8, line 7, the words "state zip code" should have read "pull rip cord."

~ It was incorrectly reported last Friday that today is T-shirt Appreciation Day. In fact, it is actually Teacher Appreciation Day.

~ There was a mistake in an item sent in two weeks ago which stated that Ed Burnham entertained a party at crap shooting. It should have been trap shooting.

~ There are two important corrections to the information in the update on our Deep Relaxation professional development program. First, the program will include meditation, not medication. Second, it is experiential, not experimental.

~ In the City Beat section of Friday's paper, firefighter Dwight Brady was misidentified. His nickname in the department is "Dewey." Another firefighter is nicknamed "Weirdo." We apologize for our mistake.

~ Our newspaper carried the notice last week that Mr. Oscar Hoffnagle is a defective on the police force. This was a typographical error. Mr. Hoffnagle is, of course, a detective on the police farce.

~ In a recent edition, we referred to the chairman of Chrysler Corporation as Lee Iacoocoo. His real name is Lee Iacacca. The Gazette regrets the error.

~ Apology: I originally wrote, "Woodrow Wilson's wife grazed sheep on front lawn of the White House." I'm sorry that typesetting inadvertently left out the word "sheep."

~ In one edition of today's Food Section, an inaccurate number of jalapeno peppers was given for Jeanette Crowley's Southwestern chicken salad recipe. The recipe should call for two, not 21, jalapeno peppers.

~ The marriage of Miss Freda vanAmburg and Willie Branton, which was announced in this paper a few weeks ago, was a mistake which we wish to correct.

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