logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

The War of the Navels

The War of the Navels

People have navels of different kinds,
Ineys and outeys, to that we're resigned;
And so it has happened as it has before,
The difference became a reason for war.

Each side said that the other side was to blame,
For possessing navels that were not the same,
As those they were born with, and greatly admired,
A thing of rare beauty, all people desired.

Ineys and outeys both quickly became
A cause for great pride or a reason for shame;
And even when courtship had barely begun,
It created friction 'twix father and son.

A young man said, "Father, you give good advice,
But I find her navel exceedingly nice!"
His father said, "Son, don't you know it's a sin
To marry a girl with a navel curved in?

Our preacher will tell you, that without a doubt,
Your future wife's navel will have to curve out!"
The world has a great many problems to solve,
But none of them were half as hard to resolve;

Not one of the statesmen knew how to begin,
To decide if navels should curve out or in;
One said, "that the quarrel would not have begun,
If we were like Adam and did not have one!"

Then a plastic surgeon, a man of great fame,
Said, "We will make all belly buttons the same,
Then there never will be a cause to make war,
And peace will reign on the earth forevermore!"

But congress, as always, implanted a doubt,
Asked, "Will you make navels curve in or curve out?
Ineys and Outeys must both keep their pride--"
The doctor said, "We'll flip a coin to decide!"

The coin landed heads, and the Ineys had won,
And all belly buttons flashed under the sun,
Were shapely and beautiful, devoid of sin,
Because every one of the navels curved in.

The munition makers complained they'd grow poor,
Since all were the same, there'd be no cause for war!
But Satan replied, "There's no need for regrets
We'll foster a war between blonds and brunettes!"
(Lee Daniel Quinn)

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Teapot Computer

    The secretary in our mental-health clinic chose a new screensaver -- a picture of a…
  • Default Image

    Dance Rejection

    A rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at…
  • Default Image

    Signs of Banned Substances

    Signs That An Athlete Is Using A Banned Substance:Gets "psyched" before each competition…
  • Default Image

    Grandma and God

    My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are…
  • Default Image

    Ode to a Shedding Cat

    I think that I shall never seeA cat that sheds as much as thee. Thy fur that sticks is…
  • Default Image

    With Friends Like That...

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night one…
  • Default Image

    Shopkeeper's Competition

    The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next…
  • Default Image

    Foreign Phrases - Sort of

    A New York magazine recently ran a contest. The rules were to take any well-known phrase…
  • Default Image

    Removing The Dents

    A goober left his car out in a hail storm. When the storm was over he checked the car and…
  • Army march joke

    Morning March

    I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding…
  • Fruitcake

    Fruit Cake Top Ten

    Sincere apologies to all of you who truly enjoy fruitcake. Unfortunately, it has a…
  • Default Image

    In My Day

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
  • Default Image

    Too Late To Date

    An elderly woman died last month.Having never married, she requested no male…
  • Default Image

    Ad Woes

    A disappointed soft drink salesman returned from his Middle East assignment. His boss…
  • Default Image

    Zoo Trip

    Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his…