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More Jokes

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    Nervous Bride

    Apparently this is a true story. A woman in her forties got married but was bit nervous…
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    Card Name

    Those of us who worked at the front desk of a convention hotel in Williamsburg, Va.,…
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    Mirror Honesty

    A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full…
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    Three Red Lights

    Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Neither could barely see over the…
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    Novice Immerser

    The young son of a Baptist minister was in church one morning when he saw for the first…
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    Enjoyment of Food

    Old Abraham was a poor tailor whose shop was next door to a very upscale French…
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    Starting Over

    The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have…
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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    Out of Gas Options

    The young woman sat in her stalled car, waiting for help. Finally two men walked up to…
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    Cast Your Bread

    My mom, a difficult independent, likes sitting by the park feeding the pigeons. One day…
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    First Date

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of…
  • Picture of a hunter

    Pygmy Hunter

    A Hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing…
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    Bear Hunting

    Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for…
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    Flossing

    As a dental hygienist, I always encourage patients to floss. During one cleaning, the…
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    Just A Kiss Per Yard

    Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy…

Theories Of Cat Behavior

LAW OF CAT INERTIA

A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

LAW OF CAT MOTION

A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION

Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY

All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT

A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION

A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn't Matter.

LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE

As yet undiscovered.

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