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More Jokes

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    Where'd we get him?

    Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where'd we…
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    Conductor Comment Comeback

    A conductor was having a lot of trouble with one drummer. He constantly gave this guy…
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    Stuck Between Floors

    Soon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the…
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    Chow

    "Chow looks wonderful," I told the mess sergeant, a large, intimidating man. "I'd love…
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    The Next One

    After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband…
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    Jar Number 47

    A new miracle doctor had just arrived in town. He could cure anything and anybody, and…
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    Some Wacky Definitions

    EGOCENTRIC: a person who believes he is everything you know you are. MAGAZINE: bunch of…
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    Better By Train

    A large two-engine train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance, one of…
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    Shoe Repair

    Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from…
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    Successful Ice Fishing

    Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long ice fishing. One has been having no…
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    10 Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    10 Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…
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    Golf Discovery

    A wife was getting tired of her husband golfing every Saturday, so she decided to go with…
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    Goober Widow

    A woman brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer.…
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    Horseshoe Look

    One day a cowboy walked into a blacksmith shop and picked up a horseshoe, not realizing…
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    The Hokey Pokey

    *The Hokey Pokey*Original LyricsPut your left foot in,Your left foot out,Your left foot…

Theories Of Cat Behavior

LAW OF CAT INERTIA

A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

LAW OF CAT MOTION

A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION

Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY

All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT

A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION

A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn't Matter.

LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE

As yet undiscovered.

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