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More Jokes

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    Flashlight Defense

    A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an…
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    Goober Quotes

    I got some bad news today. You know the money you get from those ATM machines? It comes…
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    Plane Programming

    At a recent computer software engineering course, the participants were given an awkward…
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    Found Wallet

    While shopping in a supermarket in Washington, D.C., I heard over the PA system:"A wallet…
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    Goat for Dinner

    The young couple invited their elderly pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the…
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    CD Entrance

    At our local crematorium families are given the chance to chose the music CD they would…
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    Golfing Seniors

    "How was your golf game, dear?" asked Jack's wife Tracy. "Well, I was hitting pretty…
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    Virus Warning!

    WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!IF YOU RECEIVE A GIFT IN THE SHAPE OF A LARGE WOODEN HORSE DO…
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    Poor Dad

    A father worked as an accountant for the Air National Guard. Despite a regular adequate…
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    Word Impatience

    Our five-year-old son went to a church conference with my wife and me. He got restless,…
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    Missing Bags

    I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area so I went to the lost luggage…
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    New Phonetic Alphabet

    The same old standard phonetic alphabet (which you would use to describe spelling…
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    Psychology Course

    During a phone conversation, my nephew mentioned that he was taking a psychology course…
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    You Are A Bad Cook If…

    You can find "You Know You Are a Bad Cook When...part 1" here. - The last time you tried…
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    Karmel Recipe

    The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and…

frog loveThings Not To Say To On Date

* I really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired.

* I refuse to get cable. That's how they keep tabs on you.

* I used to come here all the time with my ex.

* I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it.

* Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice on the answering machine every hour.

* I really feel that I've grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn't have given someone like you a second look.

* And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity leg hair contest.

* I know you said you don't eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask.

* It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just won't be as smart as I am.

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