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    Fishing Advice

    Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then, another…
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    Punishment Withheld

    Teacher: " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also…
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    Cheap Loan

    Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York…
  • picture of a thanksgiving turkey

    Turkey Size

    A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one…
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    CIA Note

    A college graduate applied for a job at the Central Intelligence Agency. Together with…
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    Words to Ponder

    *Words to Ponder* Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. I'd kill…
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    Parenting Test

    MESS TEST Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the Wet…
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    I can't come in to work today because . . . .

    - "My son dropped the car keys in the toilet and I sent him in after them. Now I'm…
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    Reasons Not To Wash

    If you took the same excuses that people use for not going to church and apply them to…
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    Four Letter Surgery

    Jerry is recovering from day surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling. "I'm OK,…
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    Help Wanted

    A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying: "HELP…
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    Get the Picture

    Two weeks after my one-year-old's photo shoot, I returned to the studio to view the…
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    The Gift

    A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for her birthday. A friend of his said, "I…
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    Surgeon Roast

    Harry hosted a dinner party. One of his guests was a surgeon. While deftly carving the…
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    Elementary Motherhood

    Following are answers given by elementary school-age children to the given questions: Why…
1.) Better save that.? We'll need it for the autopsy.
2.) Somebody call the janitor - we're going to need a mop
3.) 'Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness'
4.) Sparky!? Comeback with that!? Bad Dog!
5.) Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
6.) Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie
7.) Oh no!? I just lost my Rolex.
8.) Oops!? Hey, has anyone ever survived a full hypo of this tuffbefore?
9.) Everybody stand back!? I lost my contact lens!
10.) Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off
11.) What's this doing here?
12.) I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
13.) That's cool!? now can you make his leg twitch?!
14.) I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
15.) Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
16.) Sterile, shcmeril.? The floor's clean, right?
17.) Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
18.) Next, we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape.
19.) Now take a picture from this angle.? This is truly a freak of nature.
20.) This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
21.) Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
22.) Don't worry.? I think it is sharp enough.
23.) What do you mean 'You want a divorce'!
24.) She's gonna blow!? Everyone take cover!!!
25.) FIRE!? FIRE!? Everybody get out!
26.) 'And next week, we'll be learning how to stitch up a patient...'
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