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    The Envelope Please

    Morris had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech corporation. The CEO who…
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    Seconds First

    A young woman wasn't feeling well and asked one her co-workers to recommend a physician.…
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    Casket Comment

    A young minister, in the first days of his first parish, was obliged to call upon the…
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    Young Dressing

    When I was 28, I was teaching English in a high school where occasionally the faculty and…
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    Ahh . . . Friendship

    A man, fond of practical jokes, decided late one night to send his friend a collect…
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    Skipping School

    The local high school has a policy that the parent's must call the school if the student…
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    Medical Alert

    A little girl was wearing one of those Medical Alert bracelets. Someone asked her what…
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    Reward Change

    A lady lost her handbag at the mall. An honest young lad found it and returned it to her.…
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    Preacher's Best Years

    A preacher, who shall we say was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help…
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    Go Easy at First

    Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob just went straight…
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    Nice Boyfriend

    One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they…
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    Sending It With Him

    There was a man who had worked all of his life and had saved all of his money and was a…
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    Miles and Eggs

    The teacher noticed that Mike had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get…
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    Lost Gas Cap

    David filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station. After he had paid and driven…
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    Kids Say the Darndest Things

    Kids say the darnedest things. Some grade school teachers must agree with that, because…
Things you'll never hear a man say:

1) Here honey, you use the remote.
2) Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt?  That's one movie I gotta see!
3) While I'm up, can I get you anything?
4) Aww, forget Monday Night football, let's watch Melrose Place.
5) Hey, let me hold your purse while you try that on.
6) We never talk anymore.

Things you'll never hear a woman say:

1) What do you mean today's our anniversary?
2) Can we not talk to each other tonight?  I'd rather just watch TV.
3) Ohh, this diamond is way to big!
4) Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there.
5) I don't care if it's on sale, 300 dollars is way to much for a designer dress.
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