logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Noah Glue

    Ending his sermon, a preacher announced that he would preach on Noah and the Ark on the…
  • Default Image

    Sarahella

    After watching the movie Cinderella, five-year-old Sarah started using her pinwheel as a…
  • car old

    Battery Life

    An angry motorist went back to a garage where he had purchased an expensive battery for…
  • Default Image

    Military Chat

    During the second Gulf War, I was an Air Force colonel. I routinely flew on different…
  • Default Image

    Nephew Caddy

    My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game. "You have to count my…
  • Default Image

    Pastors' Good News/Bad News

    Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.Bad News: You lost two of them in…
  • Default Image

    Dangling Participles

    Dangling Participle Alert!~ The burglar was about 30 years old, white, 5' 10", with wavy…
  • Default Image

    Keeping Warm

    (switch this one around to suit your favourite/favorite make) Chevy has added wires to…
  • Default Image

    Wallet Thanks

    A lawyer had successfully handled a difficult law case for a wealthy friend. Following…
  • Default Image

    Ecumenical Small Talk

    My Protestant clergy friend was speaking with a Catholic priest and wanted to make a…
  • Default Image

    Remember The Elderly

    The following is a letter received by a pastor from an 86 year old lady. The lady…
  • envelope

    Ahh . . . Friendship

    A man, fond of practical jokes, decided late one night to send his friend a collect…
  • Default Image

    Seeing Eye Dogs

    Two men are walking their dogs. The first guy has a doberman, and the second guy has a…
  • Default Image

    Do As I Say!

    An old blacksmith realized he was soon going to quit working so hard. He picked out a…
  • Default Image

    Sermon Follow-Up

    A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To…

Written by Danny Dutton, age 8, from Chula Vista, California, for his third grade homework assignment to "Explain God."

boy sitting"One of God's main jobs is making people. He makes them to replace the ones that die so there will be enough people to take care of things on earth. He doesn't make grown-ups, just babies. I think because they are smaller and easier to make. That way, He doesn't have to take up His valuable time teaching them to talk and walk. He can just leave that to mothers and fathers.

"God's second most important job is listening to prayers. An awful lot of this goes on, since some people, like preachers and things, pray at times besides bedtime. God doesn't have time to listen to the radio or TV because of this. Because He hears everything there must be a terrible lot of noise in His ears, unless He has thought of a way to turn it off. God sees everything and hears everything and is everywhere which keeps Him pretty busy. So you shouldn't go wasting His time by going over your mom and dad's head asking for something they said you couldn't have.

"Atheists are people who don't believe in God. I don't think there are any in Chula Vista. At least there aren't any who come to our church. Jesus is God's Son. He used to do all the hard work like walking on water and performing miracles and trying to teach the people who didn't want to learn about God. They finally got tired of Him preaching to them and they crucified Him.But He was good and kind like His Father and He told His Father that they didn't know what they were doing and to forgive them and God said OK.

"His Dad (God) appreciated everything that He had done and all His hard work on earth so He told Him He didn't have to go out on the road anymore, He could stay in heaven. So He did. And now He helps His Dad out by listening to prayers and seeing things which are important for God to take care of and which ones He can take care of Himself without having to bother God. Like a secretary only more important. You can pray anytime you want and they are sure to hear you because they got it worked out so one of them is on duty all the time.

"You should always go to Church on Sunday because it makes God happy, and if there's anybody you want to make happy, it's God. Don't skip church to do something you think will be more fun like going to the beach. This is wrong! And, besides, the sun doesn't come out at the beach until noon anyway.

"If you don't believe in God, besides being an atheist, you will be very lonely, because your parents can't go everywhere with you, like to camp, but God can. It is good to know He's around you when you're scared in the dark or when you can't swim very good and you get thrown into real deep water by big kids. But you shouldn't just always think of what God can do for you. I figure God put me here and He can take me back anytime He pleases.

"And that's why I believe in God."

Powered By JFBConnect