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    Three Escape

    Three women escaped from prison....one was a goober. They ran for miles until they came…
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    Patio Problem

    My husband, Ray, was attempting to build a patio for the first time. He bought 100 cement…
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    Pet Hotline

    The Iams Pet Professionals, a team of 30 trained customer service representatives at The…
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    Three Chairs

    A Methodist minister meets three Baptist deacons on the golf course and invites them to…
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    Last One

    A New Mom took her baby daughter to the supermarket for the first time. She dressed her…
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    Roast Woes

    The newly-married husband came home from the office to find his young wife in floods of…
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    Reading Glasses

    I took my 5 year old grandson to the optometrist to pick up his new glasses. The glasses…
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    Dishwasher Repair

    Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work…
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    10 Minutes Alone

    After a day of grueling maneuvers under the blazing Texas sun, the platoon stood in front…
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    Top Ten Best Golf Caddie Remarks

    #10 Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake." Caddy: "Think you can keep…
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    Reading At Lunchtime

    A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench…
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    Ungrateful Son-In-Law

    A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. "I love my daughter,…
  • roofers

    Cinderoofer

    When my children received the video of Cinderella as a summer gift, they watched it…
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    State of the Pastor

    The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week.He walked…
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    Removing The Dents

    A goober left his car out in a hail storm. When the storm was over he checked the car and…
A man in a supermarket was pushing a cart which contained, among other things, a screaming baby.

As the man proceeded along the aisles, he kept repeating softly, "Keep calm, Thomas. Don't get excited, Thomas. Don't yell, Thomas."

A lady watched with admiration and then said, "You are certainly to be commended for your patience in trying to quiet little Thomas."

"Lady," he declared, "I'M THOMAS!"
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