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    Proper Attire

    Proper attire is required in the cafeteria at the University of Maine. To enforce that…
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    Other Uses for Fruitcake

    1. Paint a few white and place them outside on the grass so people won't park on your…
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    Tax Forms

    It was April and Tax Day was looming when an elderly woman showed up at my desk at the…
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    Gravity Situation

    I saw a report recently, about how gravity, which is a non-renewable resource, is…
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    Mellowing Mom

    I have five siblings, three sisters and two brothers.One night I was chatting with my Mom…
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    If Dr. Seuss Wrote for Star Trek: The Next Generation

    Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star,So, Data, please, how far? How far? Data: Our ship…
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    Actual Signs

    Bucharest Hotel Lobby - "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time you…
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    Hunting Prayer

    The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season. Our…
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    First Job Hunting

    Recently, our 18-year-old daughter started hunting for her first real job. She spent an…
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    Sunday Compliment

    The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it…
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    Stuff You Don't Want To Hear From Tech Support

    *Stuff You Don't Want To Hear From Tech Support*"Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick…
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    Quips to Ponder

    If your life takes a turn for the worse, remember that you are the one who is driving! My…
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    Marriage Proposal

    Some teachers at state universities get to know our students fairly well. One instructor…
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    Border Declaration

    Finishing up our work at a trade show in San Diego, my co-worker Maureen and I decided to…
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    Banking Hiccup

    While waiting in line at the bank, a coworker developed a very loud case of hiccups. By…
Unaware that Indianapolis is on Eastern Standard Time and Chicago on Central Standard Time, Bob inquired at the Indianapolis airport about a plane to Chicago.

"The next flight leaves at 1:00 p.m.," a ticket agent said, "and arrives in Chicago at 1:01 p.m."

"Would you repeat that, please?" Bob asked.

The agent did so and then inquired, "Do you want a reservation?"

"No," said Bob, "But I think I'll hang around and watch that thing take off."
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