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More Jokes

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    Jury Duty

    Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case?Juror: I don't…
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    Tub Baptism

    A friend of mine took her four-year-old daughter to a baptismal service at her church.…
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    Colonial Break

    A company offered tours through the historic district, led by guides dressed in Colonial…
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    Tracing Family

    Dear Abby:I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to…
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    Goober Medical Terms

    enign.......................What you be after you be…
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    Delete Button

    Unfortunately, we humans do not come equipped with delete buttons for our mouths.My…
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    Things You Will Never Hear

    Things you'll never hear a man say: 1) Here honey, you use the remote. 2) Ooh, Antonio…
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    Captain Comeback

    I worked in the biology department at Buffalo State College in New York. The Great Lakes…
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    Cheap Loan

    Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York…
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    Geneology Question

    When my granddaughter, Ann, was 9-years-old, she was given an assignment by her teacher…
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    Thoughts on Golfing

    A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can…
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    Art Good News/Bad News

    An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on…
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    The Mystery Of Women

    I know I'm never going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take…
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    Teenaged Daughter Owner's Manual

    Instructions for all those with teenage daughters or daughters who think they are…
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    Fishy Dinner

    A friend hosted a dinner party for people from work and everyone was encouraged to bring…
Some Tips for the Clueless

If you're bidding on a job for UPS, don't send your bid by FedEx.

If your computer says, "Printer out of Paper," this problem cannot be resolved by continuously clicking the "OK" button.

If you want your refrigerator's ice maker to work, you need to hook it to a water source.  Air doesn't make good ice unless it is mixed with water.

No matter how much data you add to your laptop, it will not get heavier.

A bad place to store your emergency backup diskette is on the underside of your desk drawer, secured by a large magnet.

It's okay to use the Polaroid Land Camera on a boat.

When the PC says, "Insert diskette #2," don't do it immediately.  Remove disk #1 first, even if you're sure you can make them both fit in there.

When your PC says "You have mail," don't go to the company mailroom and look for a package.

The French version of Netscape Navigator doesn't translate English language web pages into French.

If you're in the armed services and it's April 1st and you get an e-mail message to call Colonel Sanders for new orders, don't.

If you go to the computer store to buy a mousepad, you don't have to specify whether it's for a Windows or a Macintosh.
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